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This means that a gay rights activist coined the word heterosexual as a by-product of creating the word homosexual.
A way that bisexual researchers often talk about this is that the bi in bisexual means two, but the two are not men and women, they are same and other.
Roses are an example of a popular bisexual plant.
Kinsey flipped around sexual norms; instead of heterosexuality being the default, he thought that bisexuality was.
In other words, it is not practical for most of us to get rid of labels entirely, but we must also not attribute too much power or elegance to them.
I like how American bisexual activist Robyn Ochs eloquently put it in 2009: “[Bisexuality is] the potential to be attracted, romantically and/or sexually, to people of more than one [gender], not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”
about it and I never thought to ask. Why didn’t I ask? One reason was probably because, as a bisexual person, it always felt like Pride, and identity flags, and fabulous queer communities weren’t for me. I had always felt like an ally, not a community member.
Instead of searching for evolutionary reasons to justify the existence of homosexual behavior, we should be looking to justify the existence of exclusively heterosexual behavior.
“One of the main arguments for human homosexual behavior is that it helps bond male groups together, particularly where a group of individuals are dependent on each other, as they might be in hunting or warfare.”35 For example, the Spartans in ancient Greece encouraged homosexuality among elite troops: “They had the not unreasonable belief that individuals would stick by and make all efforts to rescue other individuals if they had a lover relationship.”
The research described in this chapter has led me to believe that I’ve been sold the lie that heterosexual sex is normal and the most adaptive. Instead, it seems increasingly clear that exclusively monosexual behavior is what needs to be explained.
You can see so many bi myths rear their ugly heads in this statement, including the myth that bisexuality is a trend, that bisexual people are lying, that girls who have only dated boys can’t be bisexual, all dripping with an undertone that people who say they are bisexual are attention-seeking. What’s sad is that the opinions of Anonymous Dad are not unusual, and these opinions are a major barrier to coming out.
The politicization of trans bodies has been part of a culture war that has made trans people the scapegoats for unease around the malleability of gender. The violence, vitriol, and perceived righteousness of prejudice and the villainization of people who just want to live their lives in the bodies they identify are right for them, is astonishing.
No matter what your sexual identity, you can be promiscuous or unfaithful or never want to settle down with only one person . . . or you can be sexually conservative or faithful or want to be married with a white picket fence. The difference, however, is that as a bisexual person you are constantly asked why. Why do you want these things? Why do you have sex with the people you do? How can you know this is what you really want? Are you sure? How can you be sure? What if you change your mind?
