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And then he leaves, my heart resumes a steady beat, and I will myself to act like a normal human being again.
It’s all very embarrassing, the fact that I devolve into a flustered teen every time I’m in his presence.
It’s time to go against my play-it-safe personality and do something bold for a change.
a thirty-two-year-old woman, have to coach myself through a calming breathing exercise in preparation to ask a guy out.
My voice isn’t one bit squeaky, like I assumed it would be. I sound cool and calm, not at all like the nerve-racked nerd that I actually am.
grateful for a best friend who for the past twenty years of our friendship has loved me unconditionally despite my near-constant awkwardness.
just . . . I don’t know what’s wrong with me. People
I’m used to this, but today it feels like a testament to my ability to make a mess.
I just slowly die of embarrassment instead.”
Just thinking about how different I look from them sends a flash of insecurity through me.
“I’m definitely not his type. And I feel like a loser for even thinking I had a chance with him.”
you’re kind, sweet, loyal, and selfless.
Never, ever, ever talk yourself down.”
Her floral perfume hits my nostrils and I close my eyes. It’s the most comforting scent in the world.
It wasn’t what I dreamed I’d be doing, but it’s what I’m meant to be doing.
I get to bake. I get to make people happy with my food.
get to make sure my family is financially secure. That’s...
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“I could really use some company after that phone call,”
“What words?” I tilt my head at him. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.” “Refresh my memory.”
I need to just live in the moment and say exactly what I’m thinking.
“I thought it was amusing. And funny. And really damn cute.”
He’s in disbelief just like me . . . and maybe that means he’s liked me for a while too.
he’s a kind, supportive person who gives people chances. The
repay him that same kindness and support right now.
A phantom pain lands like a blow to the pit of my stomach. Somehow it hurts worse than a punch.
just wasn’t in a good headspace.”
Yesterday was a mistake—fooling around with me was a mistake. He couldn’t have been more obvious about it.
“Got it. Loud and clear,”
“Let’s just forget anything ever happened between us. Okay?”
I’m so, so pathetic.
I’m thirty-two years old and crying over yet another asshole guy.
No more tears for a guy who’s not one bit worth it.
survived. I thrived. And that’s exactly what I’m going to do when next week
I’ll be professional. I’ll be dedicated to my wo...
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I don’t want to stop things with Joelle. That’s not even close to how I feel.
I’ve always had a crush on Joelle. From the minute I met her when I opened Stacked next door to her bakery, I couldn’t get her out of my head.
so kind and welcoming. And so fucking pretty.
I could only think of Joelle.
You’re the last person in the world who’d know anything about family stuff.
They made me feel welcome and wanted since the day they met me . . . a feeling I’ve never had.
wondering how the hell I’m going to make this right with her.
“What would you two do? If you had a shot with your dream girl and you fucked it up, how would you make it right?”
when I see the familiar number flash across my screen—the number I’ve purposely never saved to my phone—anger rockets through me.
I need to do something to fix this. I just don’t know what.
maybe if she knows I’m thinking about her, it’ll make some sort of difference.
I’m like a stranger to him now. It’s the worst feeling.
I live for your bibingka.
My life was pastries. But this ooey, gooey, coconutty rice flour cake saved me.
I’ll love you forever for introducing me to it.”
That means the world. Truly.”