Gloam (Monstrous, #4)

by Lily Mayne

think you have far too much faith in me.” “No.” Gloam pulled me even closer, until I had to let go of his harness and instead wrap my arms around his neck. “I have just the right amount of faith in you, Adam. I have no doubt about what you are capable of achieving.” I sucked my lower lip into my mouth to try and hold back the weepy grin that threatened to emerge. I wanted to preen under his attention. I could see the pride in his eyes, directed solely at me,

You are…” His breath shuddered out of him, and he suddenly yanked me tight to him, burying his face in my neck. “I am in your debt forever, Adam.” “No.” I trailed my fingertips across the back of his skull and over the sweet, tapered tops of his ears. “No debts. To anybody.”

“You’re free now. Free of Mary and free of the cage.” I slid my hand around to brush my thumb over his grey lips. “Look at that pretty mouth.” Gloam snorted, hefting me higher in his arms, the chained forearm supporting my backside. “Nothing about me is pretty. Not like you.” “Not true.” I leaned in and started kissing all over his face. His flat nose, those ridges in the centre, the corners of his wideset eyes. “Everything about you is perfect. Including that voice.”

“Keep talking,” I mumbled, breathing in the scent of his skin. “You’ve had to listen to me talk shit for weeks without being able to tell me to shut up.” “I hung on every word you said,” Gloam told me, his mouth moving against my hair. “There is no sound I enjoy more.”

I leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to the base of his throat, my stomach tightening when Gloam shuddered from the feel. Trailing my lips higher, I pressed kisses all the way up his neck to the lobe of his sweet ear. I’d told him to keep talking, but there was something else we could do now. My lips were already trembling as I kissed the hinge of his jaw, then his cheek. Gloam’s hands gripped me tighter, but otherwise he remained perfectly still. Waiting.

My tongue grazed a fang, not hard enough to draw blood, making Gloam shudder. I could already taste metal, but it didn’t bother me in the slightest. I loved it, because it was him.

I completely melted against him as we kept kissing for long, long moments that I never wanted to end. There was still so much to do. We needed to get the rings out of Gloam’s back. The beasties had to be freed somehow. Mary’s body was literally cooling on the other side of the barn, her pet shulc consuming her like it hadn’t eaten in months. But all of it could wait.

Gloam gently set me back on the ground, pressing a final kiss to my forehead. “Stay here. Don’t watch. I’ll get rid of… what’s left.” I swallowed and nodded. The shulc had been eating loudly the entire time we were distracted with each other. I didn’t particularly want to see how much of Mary was still over there.

I flushed at the sudden realisation that all these beasties had witnessed our first kiss. Our first several kisses. The frantic, desperate way we’d gone at each other, unwilling to break apart even to breathe. “Sorry for the show, guys,” I said with a nervous chuckle,

“I’ll clean this up, then we’ll go back to the house and take the rings out of your back, yeah?” I was still scared to do it—terrified of hurting Gloam—but felt confident that we could get over this final hurdle. Honestly, right now, I felt like I could achieve anything. I was about to mop up Mary’s brains, for fuck’s sake. “Not yet, my love.”

“I want to free them first. I may not be able to move for a while after we take the rings out. It’s not fair to make them wait any longer.” “What?” I froze, staring up at him. “You may not be able to move?” He gave a small shrug. “There is a chance. They are behind my spine.”

I trust you completely.” He eased the big bottle of bleach from my clenching grip and set it on the floor, then raised my hands to his mouth. “You were so careful before,” he said, kissing the backs of my gloved hands. “These gentle, clever hands.” He kissed them again then grinned up at me, and my breath caught from how beautiful he was. “I have felt them on every part of me. I know just how clever they are.”

“Don’t make me get a boner while I’m kneeling in blood. Who knows what kind of kink could spawn from that.”

“Where… where did you put her?” I asked quietly, keeping my head down as I started scooping up brain matter and shards of skull. My stomach lurched, but I pressed my lips tight together behind my mask. Gloam was quiet for a moment. “The lake,” he eventually said. “Weighed down with the trough.”

Are any of them dangerous?” Gloam crouched again to cup my chin. He nodded. “Some of them, yes. I will only free the placid ones for now. I would never risk you, Adam.” I gave him a wobbly smile. “I know you wouldn’t.”

“How are you going to get them open?” I asked, scrambling to my feet. I made sure to keep my hands out in front of me. My gloves were coated. “I can get them open,” was all he said, and I flushed. “Right. Of course. Monster strength.” He gave me a soft smile. “I’ll be back soon, love.”

“You’re all getting free, guys,” I said cheerfully, just in case any of them could understand me. “I know Mary—the, uh, dead woman—made Gloam capture you, but he was under her control. He didn’t want to do it. He’s going to free all of you.”

“I’m sorry you were kept like this. And I’m sorry for… for whatever Mary made you do to each other. She was evil. Not all humans are like that, I promise.”

“Bye,” I said quietly, but I realised that I couldn’t see anything resembling ears on the sides of its head. There were raised patterns over its skin, but no protrusions or holes. It had watched me closely as I spoke, and I saw its small mouth purse as though it was trying to mimic what mine had done as I said the word. I jumped a little when it raised a hand, but all it did was press it to the glass in front of me. Hesitantly, I did the same. I could have sworn that for a split-second, I saw its three fingers morph into five, like mine, its skin shifting to match my tone before it dropped its hand.

The pylk was kneeling in its cage, watching me as Gloam pushed it out of the barn. I saw it raise its hand again before it disappeared from sight.

Are you—are you ready to go inside and get the rings out?” His cabled brow furrowed with concern as he cupped my face. “Are you ready, Adam?” “No.” I laughed nervously. “But I want to do it. You’ve waited long enough.” He continued to watch me closely. “We can leave them in,” he said softly, his big thumb stroking my jaw. “I don’t mind.” “No. No way.” I reached up and clung onto his harness. “They’re coming out. I can do it. I want to do this for you.” He smiled a little and leaned down to kiss me. “My brave firebrand.”

Blood was already trickling from all the wounds by the time I set the angle grinder down with shaking hands. I pressed a kiss to the back of Gloam’s head before I continued, wanting to give him a break.

Taking a deep breath, I slowly gripped the first ring. Gloam’s back twitched. My eyes already watering, I tried to gently pull. It didn’t move an inch.

know you don’t want to hurt me, Adam, but you have to.” Gloam tried to gentle his voice, but he couldn’t mask the tense edge to it. “They have been in there a long time. You are going to need to use all your strength.” “Fuck,” I blubbered, turning my head to swipe my eyes against my sleeve. I took a shaky breath. Then another. “Okay. Okay.”

There was a wet, sucking sound followed by a heavy gush of blood. The metal ring moved less than an inch. “It’s not coming out,” I said again in utter anguish, my breaths coming too fast. Gloam let out a long exhale, visibly trying to relax his back muscles again. “Adam, if I could do this myself and spare you this, I would. But I can’t, my love. You can do it. It’s coming. Just pull as hard as you can.” I let out a weak sob and pulled, my arms shaking with the effort. Gloam grunted from the pain,

felt it catch and grind against something deep under Gloam’s skin. He cried out in agony, body shuddering.

“I can’t—My gloves are slipping from the b-blood. I can’t get a good enough grip. I—I need something.” Gloam’s breath trembled out, his voice tight when he asked, “Is there anything that will help?” I tried to think. Tried not to let the clawing panic overwhelm me. “Um… um… I… M-maybe—maybe pliers? I c-could go look in the garage.”

I sprinted my way to the garage, knowing Gloam was sitting in that room waiting for me to do this for him. No one else could. It had to be me.

The ring slowly started sliding out easier now that I had a stronger grip. Blood gushed from the holes in Gloam’s back in a constant stream, pouring down. The white towel was already soaking through, turning a rich dark brown. I could hear the grate of the metal scraping against the backs of his rib cage as I twisted, my chest tightening with misery when he cried out.

I was panting hard, sweating despite feeling cold and clammy all over. I quickly dropped the ring from the pliers’ teeth and stared at it, coated in blood and tiny bits of skin on the floor. I had to do that two more times. Gloam had to go through that two more times.

Gloam cried out again as I pulled out the second ring. I moved on to the third without pausing, determined to get it over with as quickly as possible for his sake. When the last one popped free with the pliers, his entire body let out a violent shudder as he moaned hoarsely. The pliers clattered to the floor as I stripped off my gloves and grabbed a clean towel to press it gently to the wounds, trying to staunch some of the blood.

“They’re out.” I kissed the back of Gloam’s head again and again. He groaned in utter relief and straightened, all the muscles in his back flexing, causing more blood to gush from the open wounds.

“Thank you,” he murmured, lifting my hand to his mouth to kiss my knuckles, before turning it to drop another kiss to my palm. “Thank you, Adam.”

“Do you feel better?” I whispered, trailing my fingertips back and forth over a cabled ridge on his chest. “Now they’re gone?” Gloam gave me a soft smile. “Yes.” He lifted my hand and kissed my palm. “You are my Androcles.” I grinned shakily even as I asked, “Who?” He chuckled. “The slave who pulled the thorn from the lion’s paw.”

like the lion,”—Gloam reached out and cupped my chin—“I will be loyal to you always, my Adam. I will never leave your side.”

“I can’t believe it’s all over,” I whispered when we finally pulled apart. “All of it. The cage is gone. The rings are gone. Mary’s gone.”

“I thought that maybe you’d have to try and stop me getting the cage off. That the compulsion would force you to.” “It should have,” he mused. “But I think the fact that you were doing it solely for me—not to hurt her—helped. It was the loophole we needed.”

“How did it work? With me saying something first?” “As soon as you said my true name, the hold she had started breaking. Enough for me to remove the cage and say the rest.”

“Aedonimus,” I echoed, my heart squeezing when he gave a soft smile and turned his face to nuzzle my palm. “What did it mean?” I whispered, stroking my fingertips over the cabling on his cheek. “What I said?” “It means ‘I return your name to you, Aedonimus ag ni Boetna’.” The way he said his own name was weirdly hot. Deep and rich, rolling off his tongue. I shivered.

He kissed the top of my head. “So I am very lucky that you are not a bloodthirsty little firebrand.” I balked at the idea of killing anyone. “No thirst for blood here. I’ll leave you to do any skull-bashing in the future. You were good at it.” Gloam chuckled. “Thank you, I think.” He looked at me, his gaze intense yet still soft. “I will protect you from all harm, my love.”

Luckily, Mary and the Herald aren’t very smart. Evidently, neither are my brothers.” He let out a humourless snort, then brushed his lips over my forehead. “And they never expected you.” “So that was our loophole?” I asked sleepily, rubbing my nose against the base of his throat. “Yes. She was in no true danger until you had already finished saying the words that started breaking her hold. And then, the only danger was me.” “Clever beastie.” I kissed his skin.

I found the huge master bathroom by Mary’s study with a gigantic sunken tub. As soon as I felt that it was safe for Gloam to move around, I dragged him in there. “Jesus Christ, this is in the top three best things I’ve ever felt,” I groaned in bliss as I sank deeper into the hot water, pulling Gloam’s big body tighter against me.

“Your ass is number one, by the way. In case you were wondering.” He chuckled, smoothing a big hand down my shin beneath the water. “I am pleased to hear it, my firebrand.” Turning his head to nuzzle my ear, he murmured, “And your cock is exquisite. In case you were wondering. Just like the rest of you.” I chuckled sheepishly, the cock in question bucking from his words. We hadn’t had sex again yet, because I’d been too worried about Gloam straining his back while he was still healing.

It feels like it’s been years since we set out from the camp.” Something in me had changed, I knew. I’d been hiding away in the camp, not really any different to how I’d been when I first set foot in it at seventeen. I hadn’t been miserable. I’d been fine. Happy with what I had—still just grateful to have a place out here, and people to be with. Now it all seemed so muted and trivial without him. Now, it felt like there’d always been an empty space beside me that I had just been waiting for him to fill.

“Is your bedroom at the camp large enough for a big, beastly aytorin?” Gloam asked with a smile in his voice. I snorted. “You’re, like, the most refined person I know. Not beastly at all. And yes, there’s room. If it’s too small for you, I’ll knock down a wall and we can double up.” He chuckled. “Won’t the other raiders have something to say about that?” “As if I give a shit what they think.” I kissed his neck, all the way up to his sweet ear, my stomach warming when Gloam sighed with pleasure. “I’ll give you anything you want. If that’s a bigger room, I’ll make it happen.”

I’d never be alone again, and neither would he.

“Don’t you want to… Did you want to go see your brothers?” Gloam stiffened against me. “No. They are a lost cause. And it’s not safe for me to go back there. They would do the same thing to me again.” Pure terror gripped my insides, making me cling to him harder. “I’m sorry they did it to you,” I mumbled into his skin.

“I miss them. Not what they have become, but what they were. Who they were when we were young.” He tilted his head against my shoulder to look at me. “Does that make me weak?” “No.” I kissed the corner of his mouth. “It doesn’t.”

“But I don’t want to wallow in the past. Not when we are here together now.” Flushing with pleasure, I twined my arms around his neck and kissed him. “What about your… the city? The others?” I swallowed. “Don’t you want to go back?”

“No. I meant it when I said you are stuck with me, Adam. The pain of being without you would be worse than any other I’ve experienced. I felt it for less than a day when the Herald took you. I never want to feel it again.”