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You do have my ultimate loyalty, even after you’ve died. I couldn’t move on from you. I don’t even want to. You’re all that I am, Lily. I feel like I’m suffocating when you’re not around. And when I do breathe, you’re in every breath I take. You’re everywhere I look, everywhere I go. You’re everywhere. And that’s how I want it to be.”
“For fuck’s sake, Lily!” I say louder than intended, being seconds away from hitting something—not Lily—with my fists. “You are not alone!” “I am.” “Say that again, I dare you.”
“I fell in love with you, Lily. I spent eight, or seven, however many days I’ve actually had with you, trying to make you fall in love with me too.” She opens her mouth to speak but I cut her off before she gets to do so. “I know I’m fucking selfish. But yeah, there you have it. I love you. Now, go on, break my heart, Lily. I don’t care what you do with it, you have it all. Throw it on the streets and let a car run it over, step on it, I really don’t care, as long as you’re the one breaking me.”
“I’ve read your notebook,” he admits. Maybe my death will come earlier than expected. “You know when you so desperately wanted it back.”
HES KNOW THE WHOLE TIME
I lied. I lied to Lily when I said my sister is cancer free. She never was. She never had a chance to survive this.
Fuck me i’m not gonna survive
“You’re going to take care of Lily for me, won’t you?” She attempts to squeeze my hand. I shake my head. “I think you’re more likely going to have to do that for me.” Eira shakes her head very softly. “She’ll live.”
The room quiets down just as Eira whispers, “I love you.” She takes her last breath, eyes closing… and they never open up again.
“You didn’t tell me Lily called yesterday?” “Well, your sister died, so forgive me for that.”
“Daddy said she visits Aiden now.”
“She’s gone, Colin.” His voice is nothing but a whisper.
Why is everyone dying
Apparently there’s always at least one thing to hold on to. You happen to be mine.” “Lily,” I breathe out shakily. I remain seated on the bed, frozen, not knowing whether she’s truly here or not.
“You’re alive?” he asks, still looking at me as if he doesn’t trust himself right now. “I am, Colin. I’m alive, and I don’t plan on dying today, or tomorrow, or for the next years.”
“I love you, Colin Carter. Truth be told, if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be standing here anymore. You saved me, Colin.” “Sweetheart, I’ll save you a million times more if that keeps you by my side.” His lips brush mine again, softly. “I’d burn the whole world down if that saved your life.” He pauses for a second, then speaks again. “But Lilybug, this wasn’t my doing. This was all you.”
