Change on the Fly (Totally Pucked, #1)

by Maren Moore

“Two: Shout it to the world. I’m never going to not show my love for you. I want everyone in the goddamn world to know that I’m the bastard that’s lucky enough to love you, Holland Parker. I’ll put it ...

“And three: Always stay stocked with gummy worms.” Holland tosses her head back and lets out a watery laugh. It makes me chuckle. “I mean it, babe. I promise to always have them on hand, because I can’t imagine not having you with me and Evan. At night, in ...

“Babe, we have to go inside, you’re fucking freezing.”

“I’m not going anywhere. Take as much time as you need. I just needed you to know how I felt, and that what I feel for you, it’s not going away.”

The sound of my door creaking open and the covers being pulled back causes me to stir. I crack open one eye and see Holland sliding into bed next to me. I wrap the covers back around us, to keep in the warmth, and loop my arm around her, pulling her against me.

“I couldn’t sleep. I needed to see you,”

“I really want some Captain Crunch, but it didn’t feel right to sneak any without you.” I laugh. “Is that so? I’m glad you didn’t, because then I’d have to label you a traitor.”

Leaning down, I whisper into her ear, “Babe, it doesn’t help my ego when you talk about how big I am.”

But the five days I’ve spent without Holland are by far the most painful ones of my entire fucking life. I’m a mess. So much so that Liam’s currently sitting across from me, looking at me like I’ve lost my mind. Probably have.

And I miss her. God, I miss her laugh, I miss those fucking gummy worms. I miss her making fun of me every chance she gets.

I’m in a grumpy ass mood and now Liam is trying his version of an intervention. I don’t need an intervention; I need my girl. I need this mess to be over, and my sister not to be angry and my entire world not to be flipped on its ass.

I should’ve brought Starbucks.

The candy reminds me of Holland and causes an ache in my chest. Fuck, I miss her.

“I should murder you in your sleep now, for lying to me and hiding shit from me. She’s my best friend, Reed. And I fucking know you. You have a track record for breaking hearts, and Holland is too good. She’s too pure to be tainted by your manwhore ways.”

“I love her, Em,” I say quietly.

She sits up straight and looks at me with wide eyes. “You love Holland?”

I nod. “Fuck, I’m scared. I’m scared I’ll fuck this up and do something that hurts her. I’d rather jump in front of a moving truck than ever hurt her. Not like being with another woman because she’s it for me. But, not giving her everything that I can. What if I end up like Dad?”

Em takes my hand. “Reed Davidson, don’t ever say that again. I am pissed off at you more than I’ve ever been in my life and I can still say that you are twice the man that he will ever be. You have been the best big brother my entire life. Picke...

“She taught me how to love, Em. It’s not like we conspired behind your back to hurt you. You know how much that girl loves you? She would give me up in a heartbeat if it meant keeping you. She left. The next morning when I woke up, she was gone. Uber'ed back to the city. Left a note and said...

“Holy shit, you really do love her,” Emery murmurs in a shocked, hushed tone. “I never thought I’d see the day that someone knocked you on your ass and it just so happens to be my best friend. I’m mad, but damn, I’m kinda proud.”

“Reed, I don’t care if you’re in love with Holland. I mean, I’m happy for you guys. I just… it hurt me so bad that you both lied to me, and hid this from me. Why wouldn’t you just tell me?”

“Em, Holland was terrified that you would hate her, and I didn’t want to hurt you, especially for something that started as a temporary arrangement.” When she winces and scrunches her nose, I laugh. “Sorry. At first it was supposed to be casual, just hooking up, and then… it wasn’t. I fell in love with her, even though it was against the rules.”

“Rules?” “We made a list of rules that were supposed to keep things simple, and it did anything but keep shit simple. If anything, it complicated everything. I’m sorry for keeping it from you, Em. I know Holland is too. It was important to Holland that you didn’t get hurt because of it, and I’m sorry that it blew up in our faces, and you had to find out this way. But I’m not sorry for loving her. We planned that night that we were going to tell you, and then it all went to shit before we could.”

“God, you really do love her. It’s okay, you big douche. But you better promise to never lie to me again, or I will have to hurt you.” I nod. “I swear.” “And if you hurt her, well then, I’m going to hurt you. So beware.” “Yeah, well, she won’t...

“I should talk to her. I need to talk to her. I’m not even mad at her for banging my brother. I’m just angry that she's my best f...

We sit together silently before Em springs up. “You know what. I’m going there.” I raise my eyebrows. “Right now?” “Yeah, sure, why not, she lives next door, you dork. I’ll see you later, okay?” Is she kicking me out right now? “Are you seriously kicking me out of Mom’s?” She nods. “Go. I have things to ...

“This fight is officially over.”

“You have to go to Reed.” Of all the things I expected her to say, this was not it. “Wait, what?” Emery huffs. “Holland, you are my best friend, and for someone so incredibly intelligent, you sure can be stupid sometimes.” She grins.

“Smart people can be stupid sometimes, but you acted with your heart. You have the best heart of anyone I know, Holland.”

“I’ve had feelings for Reed… for a really long time. Like, since we were kids.” Emery’s jaw drops. She sputters, “You have?” I nod. “I didn’t want our friendship to end because of how I felt. And I just didn’t ever think I’d even be on Reed’s radar. He doesn’t even know how I feel. I’ve never told anyone, until you right now.” “You have to tell him! God, Holl, this is like one of those freaking romance novels you’re constantly reading.”

“Just remember, babe, hoes before bros. I love you and I’m always here.”

“I love you. And I’m sorry that it took me so long to say that too. I’ve loved you since the first time you beat up Marcus in the eighth grade because someone called me a cow. Since the time I sprained my ankle and you carried me all the way home from the ice that day. From the very day we made the rules and said not to fall in love. It was too late then. I was already crazy about you.”

“So, here I am, being completely and totally honest with you. Asking that you give me another chance because love is scary, and love is hard sometimes, but it doesn’t mean that it’s not worth it. And I bought this dwarf seahorse because I went to the pet store and they looked at me like I was insane when I asked for a live octopus, and apparently, they don’t carry them because they’re actually really aggressive animals and are really quite large and…” Before I can even finish rambling, the sea horse is taken out of my hand and Reed’s yanking me to him and his lips are on mine.

I missed him so much my chest ached and I didn’t realize how much until now.

“Baby, I can’t believe that we just spent the past week apart over something so damn stupid.”

“This is Dill. Dill the dwarf seahorse. You know because octopuses are poisonous and kind of,” I lean in and whisper, “assholes. But he can be Pickles’s friend.”

“I fucking love you.”

“You know, it’s almost like we’re a… team.” Reed grins before he squats down and throws me over his shoulder. I yelp loudly. “Oh god, Reed Aaron, put me down! Right now!”

When he smacks my ass, not once, but twice, I squeal. He’s carrying me to his room, and once we’re inside, he tosses me down onto the bed. “I haven’t gotten a solid night’s sleep since the cabin. Time to pay up.” He grins then climbs over me. His hard body molding to mine. I haven’t slept either. If anything, I’ve spent more time wishing I was with him.

You know I’ve been thinking a lot over the past five days.” “About?” I ask. “You. Us. Evan,” Reed pulls me into his body, dropping kisses along my jaw, “I think you should move in with us.

“Felt like as good of a time as any. We said we wanted to communicate and be honest with each other, and I want you to move in with me. Hell, I’ve lived next door to you practically our entire lives. If there is anything I’ve learned in the past week, it’s to say what you feel and do it from the start. Don’t beat around the bush and pretend that it’s anything different. I want you here, Holland. I want you in my bed, in my truck, in the stadium when I take home the fucking Stanley Cup. I love you and I want our life to be together. With me. With Evan. With Pickles. And Dill. To be a family. My family.”

Our love is a lot like my favorite hockey term.” “And what’s that?” “Change on the fly. You don’t stop, you change what you have to and finish out the game.”

“I’m asking for your permission to propose to Holland. I want to marry her, sir.”

“You have my blessing, Reed. Always knew you two would end up together.” “You did?” I ask. Mike nods then shrugs. “Just the matter of you both figurin’ it out. Bout dang time.”

“Gonna give you a piece of advice, son. One that I don’t want you to ever forget. Love each other, even when it’s hard. Never go to bed mad, and always put your family first.” “I will, Mike, I promise you.”

I know without a doubt that Holland is our future. There’s never been any question. Not since that first night she sat next to me, shoving gummy worms into her mouth without a care in the world. She’s been my girl, through it all.

“When I think about my future, about our future, you’re all I see. There’s no scenario in my life where you’re not in it. I thought I knew who I was before I met you. I thought I had it all mapped out. I thought I knew exactly how it was gonna go and then you changed everything. I think I loved you the second your classic novel almost impaled me on the floor of your basement. Maybe even before then.”

“Marry me. Next year, next week, tomorrow. I don’t care. Just marry me. Be my wife. I want to spend the rest of my life waking up to you, reminding you that you are the only woman I will ever love. You’ve taught me how to be a better man. To be patient, to put my socks in the hamper and put the toilet seat down. You’ve taught me how to love. I need you now and for the rest of my life. I promise to love you through whatever trials we face, and hold your hand when things get hard. To never go to bed upset and to always put our family first.”

“Howwand, will you maww-ee Weed and stay with us forever?”

“Of course I will.” She drops to her knees in front of him and pulls him into her arms, hugging her to him. “I love you. SO much.”