Kindle Notes & Highlights
the many years of being an elementary teacher had dragged across her worn-out face.
Lots of very dramatic and colorful language
Every sound was amplified like a choir of nightmares.
Lots of very dramatic and colorful language
And because his father beat him with a belt until his backside bled and yelled at him with curses to kingdom come so much that his ears frequently rang, the poor boy always did as his father told him.
Seems unrealistic. Wouldn't his mother or other teachers have done something? Do abused children always do what they are told?
Suddenly, a heart-wrenching gasp from Bri pulled him back into reality. Rafe slammed on the brakes, causing the truck to slide uncontrollably on the wet pavement, and they came to an abrupt stop on the highway. Without a second thought, he leaped out of the truck to see what might have caused her reaction.
Why would someone jump out of vehicle to talk to the person sitting next to them?
He leaped out of the patrol car like a winged angel, a bolt straight from above, and he scooped up the boy. Rafe thought he heard gunshots, but the
How could Rafe hear raspy prayers inside a car with all the other loud things going on? More very dramatic language.
Finally, she belted out a mother’s agonizing scream and buried herself in her blankets, not knowing if she would ever come out. Her boy was gone.
As he stared off at the moon in a second of peace, his phone rang again. It was Bri. “Hey. How are you feeling?” he asked. Looking at a site on her laptop, she rattled off more information,
Mixing perspectives - seems to be showing 3rd person view of both Rafe and Bri at the same time. Confusing.
“Are you serious?” Rafe gasped as he sat up in his bed.
Earlier in chapter, Rafe was sitting in his bed. Can't find him laying down, how is he now moving to a sitting up position?
Later that afternoon, she was to return. Such is the broadcast industry.
Unclear - who is she?
Across the way, Rebah pulled into the parking lot entrance with her faded scarlet jalopy
More overly dramatic language. How do we know this is Rebah when main characters do not know?
old ventilator’s bellows move up and down
This seems to be an anachronism
she noticed Bri’s heartfelt sincerity
How can Rebah see heartfelt sincerity from a small hill by the riverbank - seems to be far from the rest of the people.
Any wrongdoing is permitted because they feel it’s right,”
True concept!
Diplomacy is always better than war.
Great quote
and blood began to trickle down the side of her head.
Biologically, getting knocked out would happen faster than blood trickling down the side of someone's head.
spiritual fortress
Why is this church a spiritual fortress?
Merlot shattered it to send all four men to follow their victims.
What is "it"? Breaking glass? How can breaking glass kill 4 people at once?
The poor mother
Why not "Rebah"?
It didn’t matter what Bri was going through; someone else always had it worse.
Good perspective to have
Rafe sat in the jail cell by himself.
Seems unrealistic to put him in jail when other people shooting and dying
It was the stylized SS that made her gasp as she jumped back, almost dropping her phone. She held her hand over her mouth and cried, trembling.
At this point in the story having a strong reaction to the letters "SS" seems incorrect.
Standing in the pouring rain, his hands clenched, and he had to pick a fight, despite being in the presence of the officer.
Everything dramatic seems to happen when it is raining. Who is Rafe picking a fight with?
then felt the urge to throw up, so she quickly ran to the bathroom.
Seems to be morning sickness. Morning sickness typically occurs at the earliest at 4 weeks.
finally pregnant,
Most women would not know they are pregnant until 2 to 4 weeks. Doctors don't see patients that early even when high risk pregnancy or risk of losing the baby.
There were theories that they could be AI,
Seems out of place. Should be "be an AI" as it means Artificial Intelligence. Do you mean a robot?
She hadn’t noticed the small blood spatter on the side of her dress.
If main character doesn't notice small blood spatter why does the reader see it?
War in Heaven,”
Very obscure reference from Revelations. Not sure this fits with Christian theme.
flood of memories came back to her, and she recounted, “I was shopping for a new suit for my job interview, and I looked down at my phone. McKendrick
They have been married for sometime and lived through this together. Seems more appropriate for this to be thoughts in character's head rather than dialogue.
“Hey, there’s a deer over there,
Deer are a symbolic representation in this novel. I've seen lots of deer, but it's very rare to see a solitary deer, unless it is a buck. Even when they appear to be solitary there are usually many more that you don't notice until you look more. Also subject object "it, he" should agree.
the blonde girl sneezed violently, and a few spots of blood spattered on the counter. Without waiting for the total, he threw down the cash on the counter, picked up his bags, and ran out the door.
Seems like a non-sequitur - sneezing is not related to picture flashing up on tv.
From her best guess, she was about 15 weeks pregnant with 740 miles left to hike before winter.
Pregnancy doesn't seem to line up with "Day X" at beginning of chapters. Also hiking 740 miles should take 35 - 80 days... Distance seems incorrect based on starting and ending points.
hoping to feel his hand,
why would she close her eyes? It's not dark. Next part doesn't make a lot of sense
In the distance, a small black void moved above the city. Rafe noticed that it carried a few lights, and it seemed to grow in size as it slowly slithered across the night sky. It drew toward them like a faceless predator. Before he could take another breath, its bright spotlight found them both, and the pulsating blades created violent gusts of wind all around them as if Hurricane Dawn had followed them to that cliff.
Something that creates violent gusts of wind is going to be loud. A black void that has lights isn't a black void. I don't understand how they could be watching it approach then be surprised and caught.
“Grab your shoes and get on!” His hands shook as he quickly strapped the wagon to his waist, and she climbed on top of the gear. “Alright, I’m ready!” she yelled out, trying to find a place to hold on. Rafe saw her shoes by the edge of the cliff and took off toward them,
Why is the wagon where they ran to but the shoes are not? They set up camp by the edge of a cliff?
They were being hunted. In desperation, he pulled out a stone from his pocket and threw it with all his might, giving out an excruciating, heart-piercing scream. Perhaps, it might hit the person. Probably not.
Seems to be a futile effort. The hunter is close enough to hit with a stone but not be seen?
held the flashlight with his left hand, and the beam shot out across the ground in front of him. The
Why would someone who knew they were being hunted turn on a flashlight?
There on his flesh was the coffin lid—a set of numbers that had already set him at naught.
This doesn't make sense.
cross the frozen St. Lawrence River at night.
Why crossing into Canada this far east?
Two days had passed since she had been taken away from him.
What happened since she died and night 166? Why would he carry a backpack when he's got a sled?
pulled out a small camping shovel. There, close to the frozen St. Lawrence River, he buried his wife in Canadian soil.
Have you tried to dig a grave in the middle of winter? It can't be done with a camping shovel.
Martin Luther’s words may have inspired the Kristallnacht.
Seems like a claim from after the fact rather than an actual inspiration.
Rafe realized from her quick movements around the office that he probably had about six minutes of her time.
Oddly specific amount of time.
Rivers
I thought there was only 1 river "Styx"
Merlot even had an interview with a reporter.
Merlot seems to have a outsized role in Canada.
Any glistening tears below his eyes and on his cheeks were several years old.
If they are several years old, they wouldn't glisten. Better to write something like ".. as if the tears were several years old"
The company had not counted on every town being deserted once they had crossed the border.
Seems odd considering they were sending a convoy of trucks. No one thought to scout a head? Send a drone? Look at satellite footage?
The Asian bowed
Seems oddly specific. How did Asians get involved?
that moment, Rafe thought of Jesus Christ walking toward Bethany with His Apostles to meet Martha, the sister of Lazarus, who had died.
Seems out of place to retell the story of Lazarus
They’re still people, and they need help. They need someone to listen to them, to hold their hand. Don’t be as heartless as they are.”
Excellent advice
As he pushed McKendrick down the middle aisle, many of the undead turned their bandaged heads toward the body and raised their arms to cross what was left of their chests. It was frightening to see the blind allegiance.
How could blind people see him? How can people who can't move their head raise their arms?
