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He wanted someone who could keep him contained, keep his body exhausted—nothing more.
He thought again about waking up in Belman’s car. How freaked out he’d been. How Belman’s sober up had been the nicest thing anyone had said to him in a while.
He didn’t work tomorrow, and that thought filled him with dread. Days when he had to figure out what to do with himself were the worst.
“Good job,” Marcus had whispered. You didn’t get many people who were proud of you for lying there and taking it.
Once he’d gotten into the car that night, once he’d stopped leering, Whitlock had looked gentle. Not crazy or strung out. A little lost, thoughtful.
“You’ve got plenty to do.” “It’s my day off.” Daniel gave a small smile. Realized he was clutching the phone too hard. “Even worse.” He watched the spider unfurl and start crawling again. “I’ll come by,” Belman said. “I got some stuff to talk to you about. About the investigation.” “Pushy,” Daniel whispered. But he was smiling just a little bit. “What’s that?” “Nothing. You can come by. I’m just here. I’m not doing noth—anything.” “All right. I’ll be by in a little while.”
That look on his face, that weird, spaced-out look. Bel knew what it meant.
At one point Mr. Roan said something about the soil not having enough iron, and Daniel found himself talking animatedly about the chemistry of topsoil, something no one—not Marcus, not Casey, not Jeff—ever used to let him prattle on about. But Mr. Roan seemed to like the information, even if he didn’t retain much of it.
“Sometimes the stuff I do to keep awake hurts a little.” “What do you mean?” “I mean I use some of that stuff from the bag to keep me awake. You want chili or not?” Belman cleared his throat. “I wanna see what’s in the bag.” No. Fuck no. Don’t do this. “No, you don’t.” “Why would I ask, then?” “Ain’t it enough? What you’ve seen already? You know I’m nuts, so let me do that stuff in peace. You don’t have to see it.” “I don’t want to see you do it. But I wanna know what you do.”
“Bel. Call me Bel.” “This ain’t an introduction. I’m yelling at you.”
Daniel managed a grin. “That’s pretty creepy.” Bel laughed. “You don’t want someone watching you sleep?” “Whole town’s watched me sleep.”
“This ain’t much of a show,” Bel noted. “I don’t want to hump your damn leg.” Bel caught Daniel’s hair and tugged, forcing his head back. “I want to see it so bad,” he whispered. “Can you want it for me?”
Vanilla, Daniel thought. No surprises there.
“I wish you’d come back to bed.” “I wish you’d stop being a fucker.”
Bel sat on the bed next to Daniel. Daniel flinched. “Uh-uh,” Bel said softly. “You don’t have to look like that. It’s me.”
