You, Again

by Kate Goldbeck

“When we first met, I was—”

Damn this book is just so depressing

“A total shithead?”

These are just two people making bad decision after bad decision and living depressing lives because of that. And why does literary every single segment or chapter have to mention sex or a sex toy.

“But you’re a softboi now?”

I hate this bruh

He makes a mental note to check the meaning of softboi on Urban Dictionary later.

Yuck this is starting to sound like Tessa Bailey

Inside the drawer is a crude drawing of a penis. It’s a fun surprise. Like finding a quarter on the ground.

Why does every fucking chapter have to mention genitalia or sex or a sex toy?!?!? My God this is so annoying.

A chonky bodega cat

no way this is a real sentence

“According to that metaphor you’re drowning in open water with someone who shoved my head underwater and never looked back.”

Oh my God i really hate Radhyas charater. She really is just a bitch. And is in no way endearing or likable.

Radhya stubs out the cigarette. “I’m not interested in being the next stop on his journey of ‘listening and learning.’ ”

Oh my God can she please just shut the fuck up

“How bad is it to send your ex a topless selfie from the bathroom of a divorce lawyer’s office? Asking for a friend.”

Holy fuck are you genuinely that stupid

“I’m self-medicating.”

Youre making poor decision after poor decision and actually, actively, ruining your own life

“I’m not interested in robber barons, colonialism, or celebrating thousands of years of sexism.” “Is there anything that’s not problematic for you?”

Fr *insert eye roll here pls*

‘Bought’?” She lets out a little cough—“white male privilege”—cough cough,

Oh my God this woman is truly insufferable

Now she’s forced to imagine meeting Josh and his hypothetical…wife for dinner. A Lauren, probably.

Damn why the hell am I catching strays from this miserable, self-loathing woman

Smiling at their inside jokes—their own little language that Ari wouldn’t know. The two of them would have stupid, petty fights, followed by amazing make-up sex. Josh would make his wife whatever healthy dish she wanted for breakfast. They’d go grocery shopping at Fairway and buy organic produce while pushing a state-of-the-art Bluetooth-enabled baby stroller.

AND WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WTH WANTING THAT, BITCH. YOU CLAIM YOU'RE A FEMINIST BUT SHAME EVERY WOMAN THAT IS DIFFERENT OR GOD FORBID BETER THAN YOU

What if he gets laid? Her stomach twists, considering that possibility.

You have slept with more than half of New York City babe you have absolutely no right to be jealous

The fact that she even has nervous feelings about it at all intensifies the stomachache.

AND YOU'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A DIVORCE FROM YOUR "OPEN MARRIAGE"

Can’t wait to find out whether the yoga instructor spends the night!

BITCH YOU WERE THE ONE THAT SUGGESTED IT U HYPOCRITICAL P.O.S.

Hadn’t she told him she was a “really great wingwoman”?

Youre literally just proving me right

If Josh can date someone, Ari can date two someones.

You are so stupid. I hate this character so much its unbearble

Josh: Dating one person is too much intimacy for you but two people is no problem?

Fr josh

Maddie, a self-professed “food influencer, but not obnoxious about it” who’s monologuing about the YouTube chefs she finds “most fuckable.”

Why is everything about fucking?? God even Sex And The City has more of a plot than this

Edison bulbs, wood paneled ceilings, subway tile walls.

Millennial Burger Joint

“What the fuck, Joshua?”

Ok this is actually kinda funny

“I’m his wife.”

Oh this is good

He’d wrapped it the way they do on sitcoms, where the lid just lifts off. He might have watched several tutorials.

Very thoughtful

“I know it’s not the bowl but it’s the same pattern with the blue rim and the dragon design.

AWWWWWW

“Oh my God.” Cass takes a step forward. “How are you?”

Good grief i probably hate this character most of all

“Engagement party.”

Oh my God no way

“Is there more to me than bong vapor and nipple piercings?”

Yikes

“That’s a ridiculous question.”

Yeah for many many reasons

“You don’t want to witness this. I’m going to cry until I’m dehydrated, smoke a bowl, and fall asleep with my hand inside a bag of Takis.

Bruh

the straps are so precarious. One unplanned twist of the shoulder and—“nice.”

Oh...

His right hand keeps trying to place itself on the small of her back as they walk. He clenches it in a fist.

OOOHHHHHH...

Sometimes it’s not until she encounters genuine parental affection that she recognizes the utter lack of it in her life. It hurts more to fill the cavity than to leave it empty.

Fr

“I like her, Joshua.” Abby takes a big gulp of her drink. “I like her.”

Oooohhh

In a move that Ari surely could not miss, Abby shifts forward to give Josh a hard stare.

Hahahahaha

She retrieves a joint from her little clutch. It seemed classier than a vape pen.

Bruhhh

Ari waits for him to take a half-step back, but he doesn’t. Neither does she.

Teeheehee

“Yes.”

OOOHHHHHHHH

“Like, a peck on the cheek or—” “No.”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

“So, quickly, but on the lips?” “No.”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

“It is.”

Holy moly im squealing like a trapped rat rn

His fingers twist slightly in her hair.

Hallelujah

He pulls her hair again, this time to the right for better access to her neck.

OH YIPPEE

who the fuck cares about friendship when you can feel like this instead of being numb?

Well duh

And the alternative is a giant blinking cursor and a blank document. Sometimes it feels like Josh has already been poking around that page. Writing passages and deleting them before she’s ready to open it.

Oooh...

Ari stays put for a few more seconds, wondering if he might stop and turn around, giving her time to catch up. But he keeps walking away, not even slowing his pace.

BOOOOOOO

“I guess you’ll just have to live there,” Josh calls over his shoulder. He takes his time coming back for her.

Dude what the fuck... I was rooting for you

I don’t care about your personal growth.”

Once again i also really hate this charcter

Ari reaches for his hand and he pulls her inside just in time.

Ugh they need sometime away from each other