Lotus

by Jennifer Hartmann

I may be safe, but I don’t feel happy. I want to go home. Hopefully, it won’t be too much longer because I miss my family. I miss sunshine. I miss her.

“I remember everything about you, Oliver. You were real. Your life before what happened to you was real.”

“You remember me?” “I thought I created you.” Sydney’s unease seems to wash away at my words and her body relaxes, a smile blooming to life. “I’ve always been here.”

Sydney is gone, but she leaves a little spark behind. I suppose she always has.

But Sydney has a presence about her—a strange, alluring aura that compels me to pull each brick out of place, one by one, until that wall comes crumbling down.

“It’s a comic book. I created it when I was a child,” I tell her, offering this woman a part of me, a part I’ve never shared outside of my cell.

“Here. I thought you might get some use out of this.” It’s a sketchpad and a box of sharpened pencils. I take the items from her outstretched hands, my heart rate increasing. Excitement. Eagerness. Gratitude.

“Thank you,” I murmur, my voice low and thoughtful. “This is very kind of you.”

My breath stops when I see Oliver Lynch in front of me, tossing my attacker to the ground, totally zoned out and throwing punches to the man’s face.

THATS MY MANN

And Oliver Lynch rescued me. The man unable to even touch another human being just fought off my attacker without a second thought. “You saved my life.”

Oliver responds so softly, I almost don’t hear him. “I always save you.”

Gabe ordered me new clothes all the way from the Amazon, and they fit remarkably well. And they arrived much quicker than one would anticipate for such a lengthy travel.

Hes so innocent and sweet omfg

“Do you want to pet her?” “Oh…” My tongue pokes out to slick my lips as I step closer to the animal, intrigued by the virile creature. “I would, if that’s all right.” Sydney smiles, and this time it’s bright and familiar, forcing my heart to skip.

“She really likes you.” My lips pull up into a small smile, an instinctual reaction to her statement. I am liked. Sydney releases a quick gasp of air, the indigo glow of her eyes intensifying with wonder. “I don’t think I’ve seen you do that before,” she murmurs softly, still standing impossibly close. I clear my throat. “You’re correct. This is the first time I’ve held a feline.” She blinks, a sharp laugh following. “Not that. I meant… smile. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile yet. Not since we were kids.” I

I squint my eyes at the strange device before turning my attention to Sydney. “Every time I address your cat, the woman in the speaker talks to me.”

The rate of my heart increases with an unexpected request that lands on the tip of my tongue. “Perhaps you can introduce me to your favorite music.” Sydney’s eyes widen, a rebellious strand of hair falling forward and tickling her temple. She combs it back, swallowing through an eager nod. “I’d love that.” I feel my walls cracking, my armor crumbling, my nerves and tension dissipating. And

“Did your mom make these?” “Yes.” “Can I have one?” Oliver studies me, debating his answer. “Only if you promise you don’t have cooties.” “I promise,” I tell him. “Cross my heart. I haven’t been sick since last Christmas.” My response seems to please him, so he picks up the plate and holds it up. “They’re oatmeal. My favorite.”

“Want to go in the backyard and jump on my trampoline?” “Sure!” I exclaim, practically leaping off the stoop with excitement. “Let’s go.”

This is so precious omg

We end the night gazing up at the star-filled sky, our shoulders pressed together, lightning bugs buzzing around us as we share stories and knock-knock jokes. I have a feeling Oliver Lynch is going to become my new best friend.

“I like when you do that,” I murmur softly, pointing at his mouth. “Consume food?” Good Lord. I can’t decide if his blunt intellect is more amusing or charming. I respond with a chuckle. “Smile.” “Oh.” Oliver nods knowingly, then swallows down the rest of his bite. “I enjoy your smile as well. It makes me want to smile more.”

MY HEART

We stand there facing each other, and I’m taken by the fact that he cares about what I think. He’s worried that my opinion of his work would not be favorable, and somehow, that touches my heart.

“Who’s this?” Oliver’s cheeks tinge pink as he fidgets in front of me. “The Queen of the Lotus,” he replies. “And the Faceless Man. He’s the villain in the comics.” The Queen of the Lotus. Heart skipping, my insides fuzzy and warm, I inquire, “Is that supposed to be… me?” He nods. “Yes… I suppose it is.” “Wow.”

processing the realization that I was never far from his mind during those years he was locked away, lost and afraid, just as he was never far from mine. We stayed connected. He turned me into something tangible, beautiful and real.

His touch makes me shiver, mostly because I didn’t expect it, but also for reasons I can’t quite explain.

sheathing me in a flurry of new sensations and an unexpected feeling of… contentment. Fulfillment. Belonging. Home.

IM CRYING

I ask him softly, timidly, our hands still connected, “Will you be my friend, Oliver Lynch?”

MY HEART

Oliver releases a surrendering breath, and his lips draw up into a smile that matches mine. A weight lifts. “I would like that.” I guess I don’t have cooties anymore.

Well, except for Sydney. Our mutual affection for the girl next door is one trait we certainly share.

“Excuse me. I need to go die.” “Please don’t do that.” I rush into the room before she can make any drastic decisions. “I apologize. I couldn’t seem to look away from your performance.” “My

She is, by far, the most perplexing, endearing, complicated, beautiful, and charming human I’ve come across so far. I’m drawn to her in many ways, and I’m not sure if it’s our past history that binds us, or if it’s something else.

Sydney has an essence about her, something intoxicating and pure. I find myself thinking about her when I’m not around her. I find myself staring at her far too long, much like I’m doing right now.

I’m not sure why, but my attention is pulled to the opposite end of the closet. “How about this little ensemble?” I suggest, reaching for one of the hangers. “Appealing, yet conservative.” Sydney gawks at me, one eyebrow arched with a flare of concern. “Oliver, that’s a snowsuit.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to accompany you?” The offer almost physically hurts me when the notion of being in such an overcrowded establishment registers. But Sydney’s safety trumps my own discomfort. “I can join you after supper.”

“Bummer about dinner, by the way. I literally daydream about your cooking.” I can’t help but smile at the compliment. I’m a fast learner when I set my mind to something, and cooking has definitely piqued my interest recently. “Thank you. Perhaps I’ll actually have something to teach you.”

“Oliver Lynch,” she scolds with mock audacity. Her wink softens her words. “You’ve been picking up some bad habits. Must be that blasphemous girl next door. Terrible influence.” I stuff my hands into my pockets, head ducking briefly before glancing back up at her with only my eyes. “Yes, well… I must admit, I’m rather fond of her.”

“I’m fond of you, too, Oliver.”

“Your suffering matters more to me than the joy of fifty acquaintances and strangers. I hope you know that.”

“We’ll be best friends forever, right?” “Yes. Until I die.” “Even then, I’ll find a way to bring you back.”

His eyes scan the crowd, drifting from face to face. I think he’s looking for me.

Our gazes finally connect across the room, and I lift my hand in a wave. The relief on Oliver’s face is evident when a smile blooms to life, tickling me from head to toe.

Blush stains his cheeks. Damn, that’s adorable.

“What made you join in on the festivities? I didn’t think I’d see you all night.” Oliver’s gaze follows the beer bottle as it catches my mouth, his tongue poking out to slick his bottom lip. “I was listening to an assortment of songs you recommended, and it made me want to see you,” he replies softly. His focus trails over me with tender appreciation, and he adds, “You look lovely.”

“Are you referring to masturbation?” The heat engulfs me from toes to top. Jesus. I was not expecting that reply. At all. “Oh, um, I mean…” Holy hell, I feel like a blushing schoolgirl in the middle of Sex Ed class. I clear my throat. “Sure. I guess.” His eyes are ablaze as they sink into me, coasting over my curves, and he answers easily, “Sometimes I think of you.” It

OH?!

“I never want to go back there.” I shake my head, adamantly. “You won’t. It’s over, and you survived. Do you trust me?” Another slow nod. “You’re the only one I trust.” Oliver’s voice is ragged and strained, but his words put my shattered heart right back together. “Good, because I won’t lose you again.”

But he surprises me by standing instead, offering me his outstretched palm—a gesture of acceptance. A token of trust. I take it, rising to my feet with a pacified smile, and we sneak out of the house, hand-in-hand.

Why doesn’t it add up, Oliver?” I couldn’t hold back, and I blamed Sydney for it. “Pardon my forwardness, but I believe that’s your job to figure out, sir.”

“You’ve got a sense of humor. My son must be rubbing off on you.” A smile twitches, but never fully forms. “Yes, and Sydney.”

stand off to the side, hands perched on my hips, watching as Travis spins his glass between his fingers. “Syd,” he smiles fondly. “That kid was a firecracker. I always thought you two were well-suited.”

“Best neighbor ever,” she mumbles through a mouthful. “Way better than Lorna.” Goodness, she’s endearing.

“We’ll have to have a nineties cartoon marathon sometime.” “I’d like that. My favorite thing to watch is The Princess Bride.” “No, shit?” She cranes her neck back as she turns to look at me. “I love that movie.” I can’t help the smile that instantly forms. “You do? We should watch it together.”