Single On Purpose: Prioritizing Self-Love and Personal Growth in Your Journey Through Life, Dating, and Relationships

by John Kim

But engagement isn’t just about the activity. Engagement means showing up in your truest form every day. Showing up for everything.

engagement means being fully there in your truth.

Engaging even when things are bad doesn’t mean allowing yourself to drown in it. It means experiencing all of life’s seasons.

Doing things out of your comfort zone. Switching shit up, like taking a different way home so you can see something new. Engagement can mean accepting, forgiving, apologizing, taking ownership. Engagement can mean dancing even if you’re embarrassed. It can simply mean getting out of your fucking house. Because not doing anything is not engagement.

Allow yourself to feel your feelings, but know that they are just that—feelings. Not facts or truth. Feelings will flow through you. And then they will pass.

Keep your thoughts positive and your feelings will be positive. Instead of thoughts that lead to anxiety and panic, think thoughts that produce feelings of gratitude and joy. Play a different movie.

Think about what you’re trying to do here. You’re trying to undo years and years of wiring and deeply ingrained thinking patterns. So it’s going to take time to rewire yourself. It’s going to take a daily practice.

Our blueprints are created by our definitions. Our definition of happy, love, healthy, success, everything. Many of us live with definitions that were given to us by parents, friends, society, advertising, and old versions of ourselves that are not honest to us anymore.

Believing you have value isn’t just an announcement or a decision.

But truly believing you have value requires years of rebuilding your relationship with yourself.

you can heal. You can rebuild. You can get to a place where you start to believe you are worth something.

When you believe you are worth something, the universe moves.

So instead of allowing your past to drown you and staying stuck in negative thought patterns that dilute your being, strip your soul, and smash your dreams, it’s time to reworth yourself and generate energy that punctures space and grabs stars.

Worth is not something you believe. Worth is something you build.

Start with one new experience. It doesn’t have to be life-changing. It can be small. Like holding a conversation without judgment. Like raising your hand in the boardroom and speaking your truth. Like pushing yourself in a new workout more than you ever pushed yourself before. Like making a decision from passion instead of from logic. Do everything you can to give yourself that experience before moving on to more and more new experiences. Know that by giving yourself new experiences, you are building your worth.

It’s a mind–body–energy thing. The higher the frequency you live on, the lighter you feel physically, emotionally, and mentally. But the challenge isn’t to get there. We can all feel love and optimism at times. What’s difficult is to stay there.

Internalized anger at yourself destroys self-worth.

There is power and healing in understanding what has made you the way you are. It neutralizes and builds a bridge that makes your change to living at higher frequencies more of an evolution than a matter of willpower.

It’s time. To believe. In love. In sweat. In building something. In starting over. Because over doesn’t mean again. Over means new. But you can’t get to new until you believe. Again.

Every. Single. Day. Know that you are valuable. Start your day like it’s your last. Seek nectar. Stretch your bright spots. Shatter your veneer. Practice transparency. Love hard. Dream big. Sweat daily. Resist nothing. Embrace your story. It’s the only one you’ve got. Don’t feed negativity. Don’t engage with negative people. Don’t live in the past. Fuck your identity. Crush your false beliefs. Prove yourself wrong. Run toward your fears instead of away. Throw your stone as hard as you can, knowing that it will send ripples. Be a prism, not a rock. Drink water. Ask questions. Turn your dial to give. Don’t gossip. Don’t seek approval or validation. Get out of your head. It’s the most dangerous place. Don’t react. Respond. Eat well, not more. Do things alone. Understand before you speak. Burn your boats. Lean forward. Forgive. Know somebody. And go to bed with fucking gratitude.