When He's an Alpha (The Olympus Pride, #2)

by Suzanne Wright

Bailey clicked her fingers. “Ooh, baptizing Hoe Bag in the pool?” His lips thinned. “Her name is Ginny. And I wouldn’t call holding her head under the water until she almost drowns a baptism.” Bailey shrugged. “She was praying.” Corbin sighed. “I don’t want to talk about her either.”

“I didn’t like the way she smelled,” said Aspen. Bailey nodded at Aspen. “She did smell weird, didn’t she? Like wet clothes that had been left in the washing machine too long. It was just … ew.”

Luke snickered. “Be an asshole all you want—I know you love me. You might have tried to kill me several times when we were kids, but you didn’t actually do it. Remember the night when I was twelve and you shoved a sock in my mouth and then tried to suffocate me with your pillow? It nearly worked, but then you stopped. You let me live. That’s love.” Tate frowned. “I stopped because you let out a moist-sounding fart that stunk like rotten eggs and almost knocked me sick.”

Luke frowned. “You call Halloween a comedy?” Bailey looked genuinely perplexed. “You don’t find it funny?” The Beta shook his head. “Can’t say I do.” “Huh. Weird.”

Bailey flicked something off her tee. “Forgiveness is for losers.”

Bailey blinked up at her. “Huh? Oh, yeah. I was just wondering if caterpillars actually know what’s gonna happen when they build a cocoon for themselves, or if they’re later like ‘whoa, what’s with the wings and shit?’”

Bailey’s brow furrowed. “My mamba would never really hurt Aspen or her bearcat. She loves them. She just also has the best time driving them to the brink of insanity. Is that so terrible?” Aspen flexed her fingers. “Just because you long ago tumbled over said brink doesn’t mean I want to.” “But it’s more fun on this side,” said Bailey. As her girls continued to argue,

Taryn sighed. “Don’t take her bitchiness personally, Tate. She can’t be nice, she sold her soul to Satan himself long ago. I’m guessing she was granted eternal life in return, because we just can’t get her to die. She has the wrinkles, the scaly skin, the fuzzy gray hair, the rickety bones, the musty old lady smell … but her heart still beats.” Greta scowled. “Oh, you wish me gone, do you?” “Every time I blow out my birthday candles. Now let’s get going, Bride of Beelzebub.” Taryn herded her toward an SUV that was idling at the curb.

“I am not senile!” Greta shouted at Taryn. “But you are fucking demented. Now get in the SUV, Wrinkles.” Taryn all but shoved the woman into the vehicle. “I did not push you, I was just trying to help.”

“The girls will adjust. They need a little time. You can give them that, right?” He opened his mouth to say a reluctant yes, but then there was an exceptionally loud hiss. A bearcat came barreling out of the house and rushed across the backyard. A mamba gave chase, slithering along the ground remarkably fast, and lunged with a hiss. The bearcat grabbed the snake by her neck and shoved her coffin-shaped head under the pond water. Watching as the bearcat tried to drown the mamba, Tate took a long swig of his beer. “No, babe. No, I can’t give them time.” Havana sighed. “Right now, I can’t even argue that you should.”

“Um, sir, the bearcat’s now hitting a mean looking snake with that shoe,” said Earl. Gideon’s brows snapped together. “What?” He tracked his friend’s gaze.

“—they would be inclined to accept you. And my family is not dysfunctional.” “You think it’s normal that your mother once gagged and bound your father to the bed in their spare room because she ‘wanted a little peace and quiet’?” “It was just role play. She freed him after two days.”

He slid his gaze back to Havana. “I treat her like my homework. Toss her on the table and spend all night doing her.” Mila lifted a hand. “That’s it, you don’t get to talk to other people anymore.”

“I only did that because you tried to drown me for the third time.” Tate shrugged. “They say ‘third time’s a charm,’ so I figured it was worth a shot.”

“Will you two stop!” a voice bellowed. Luke. Tate gritted his teeth. “He’s not here either. He’s just not.” Luke cursed long and loud. “For God’s sake, let the damn mamba go before you—ow, get your teeth out of my fucking hand!” Tate narrowed his eyes as amusement and smugness rippled down the mating bond. Unfuckingreal. Havana gave him a little smirk. “I told you the universe—” “No. Just no.”