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Love is our greatest weakness. Nothing will royally fuck you up the way love can, and I swore I would never be such an idiot for another person.
“It’s ironic that you’re here to make me better when the things I want to do to you are the worst things I’ve ever wanted to do.”
If we have not found the heaven within, we have not found the heaven without.
“Your body is not your power, Zara, and those men don’t see you. I see you, and maybe I shouldn’t say that because you’re with Nash, but I’m saying it anyway. You’re a tough girl, and your body is beautiful, but if you think it’s the most powerful thing you have, you’re selling yourself short.”
“Well, then just try to keep your clothes on when my mother serves the turkey.”
“When did this happen? I never saw this coming,” she whispers. I want to tell her that this happened a long time ago for me. Four years to be exact. The first time she stepped foot on my island, I was ruined. I made a promise to myself that I would never touch her because I knew then she’d fucking ruin me. She would be my downfall, my biggest distraction, and I was right. Even before we touched, I was helpless.
He pushes me, protects me, makes me feel safe, and I am tired of fighting against something I want so much. Call it daddy issues, I don’t care. I can’t walk away from him. I just can’t.
“What does that mean? Who am I to you?” I whisper, tears filling my eyes. Shoving my body against the wall, and pulling my face toward his, he attacks my lips with his as he answers. “You’re everything to me.”
“You make me feel good, Zara, and I haven’t felt good in a long fucking time. When I’m with you, it hurts a little less. It doesn’t go away, but I don’t hate life so much when you look at me like you’re looking at me right now,” he says. The pain etched in his features sends shivers down my spine. Reaching up, I run my fingers along his brow and down his cheek. Now that the walls are coming down, I see the pain underneath. “Am I allowed to be happy, Zara? Or is this my punishment? Loving you if I can’t have you.”
“Thanks, Dad,” I mumble into my coffee and he snaps his head in my direction. I wait quietly for his reaction to see if he’s going to be legit offended or find it funny, but he just bites his lip and stalks toward me slowly, pinning me against the counter. Putting his hands on either side of me on the counter, he leans his face down to my ear. “If we’re going to play that game, get it right. It’s Daddy to you.”
For so long I felt like I was falling, but this man pulled me in. And finally, I have landed.
I let everything melt away. The stress, the fear, the grief. It never fully goes away, but when I’m with him, it doesn’t hurt anymore.
