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“He’s a rich man. You’ll be happy.” No, the Fangs would be happy.
EWWW NO. What a way to gaslight a kid.
Well, fuck the heavenly order of things. If getting married to a gross old man was her preordained role on this earth, then Rin was determined to rewrite it.
“I can’t do it,” she whispered. “I only have two more months, and I can’t do it. Everything is spilling out of my head as quickly as I put it in, and—” Her chest rose and fell very quickly.
Too much pressure, poor Rin.
“You cripple a child, you pay a disabilities fine for their entire life. But if you kill them, you pay the funeral fee once. And that’s only if you’re caught. If you hit someone, better make sure they’re dead.”
This is so messed up...
Rin took two steps toward the boy and punched him in the face.
OMG, WHAT A WAY TO INTRODUCE YOURSELF RIN! Am I stupid for expecting an enemies-to-lovers from them?
“What’d you do to offend him?” Kitay pulled a face. “Nothing, except beat him on the exam. Nezha’s prickly about his ego. Why, what did you do?” “I gave him that black eye,” she admitted. Kitay raised an eyebrow. “Nice.”
Yes... BFF in the making!
“That’s what family arts are,” he said, wiping the sweat off his forehead.
No way, are you trying to impress Rin?
“Power dictates acceptability,” Kitay mused. “If the capital had been built in Tikany, I’m sure we’d be running around dark as wood bark.”
“Maybe he doesn’t know how to talk,” Nezha suggested.
OH SHUT UP NEZHA, YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS.
“So you’re not dying, sweetheart, your body is just shedding your uterine lining.” Rin’s jaw had been hanging open for a solid minute. “What the fuck?”
LOL silly me thought that she had murdered Nezha in her sleep!
Success required sacrifice. Sacrifice meant pain. Pain meant success.
But the misery she felt now was a good misery. This misery she reveled in, because she had chosen it for herself.
Wow, this is dark. Rin is always all or nothing.
She adored praise—craved it, needed it, and realized she found relief only when she finally had it. She realized, too, that she felt about praise the way that addicts felt about opium. Each time she received a fresh infusion of flattery, she could think only about how to get more of it. Achievement was a high. Failure was worse than withdrawal.
Uh oh, this is not going to end well.
“Killing isn’t the same as letting die,” Rin objected. “They’re casualties nonetheless.”
OMG, Rin just reminded me of Erwin from AOT. Very smart but a gambler. Kinda makes me feel uncomfortable TBH. Well, there is no easy way out of a war so you gotta do what you gotta do.
“So am I interesting?” she asked slowly. “You’re a walking disaster,” Jiang said bluntly.
“I have taught her class the crushing sensation of disappointment and the even more important lesson that they do not matter as much as they think they do.”
Jiang, you're a clown most of the time but I know that you're a true badass. I'm not falling for your facade!
Jun raised his eyes to the sky in an expression of eternal suffering.
Yup, their beef is eternal LOL.
“You’re just making things up for this training exercise.”
ISTG I can't take Jiang seriously.
“Obeying the whims of a madman. Finding a way out.”
Seems ridiculous but this is his way of training Rin. You just don't know what Jiang is thinking tho since the drugs is doing it for him.
“You darling child,” he said, spinning toward her. “You brilliant child.” Rin’s face split into a grin. Fuck it, she thought, and leaped up to embrace him.
I'm soooooo happy I feel like I'm about to cry! So proud of you, Rin!
“Sir, I just want to learn to be a good soldier,” she said. Jiang’s face fell. “You and the rest of this school,” he said.
BRUH
She hadn’t slept in three days. All she wanted was to collapse on her bunk, but another hour of cramming was worth more than an hour of sleep.
Ugh, please stop this already!
She became convinced that if she didn’t kill him, she might explode.
OH GOD NO
She wanted that power again. She wanted what Jiang could teach her.
It's like Rin is already getting consumed by her desire of power. IDK what to feel about this.
“You’re too reckless. You hold grudges, you cultivate your rage and let it explode, and you’re careless about what you’re taught. Training you would be a mistake.”
“I will take you on as an apprentice. I hope I will not come to regret it.”
OMG YESSSSSSSSS
Youth, Rin thought, was an amplification of beauty. It was a filter; it could mask what one was lacking, enhance even the most average features. But beauty without youth was dangerous. The Empress’s beauty did not require the soft fullness of young lips, the rosy red of young cheeks, the tenderness of young skin. This beauty cut deep, like a sharpened crystal. This beauty was immortal.
As Rin had learned before the Trials, Jiang’s preferred method of instruction was to do first and explain later, if ever.
She swallowed her skepticism, took a leap of faith, and chose to follow his instructions, hoping that enlightenment might be on the other side. Yet she did not leap blindly, because she knew what was at the other end. Daily, she saw the proof of enlightenment before her.
Wow, Rin's faith in Jiang is immeasurable.
“Don’t be silly. I am not a god,” he said. “I am a mortal who has woken up, and there is power in awareness.”
She hadn’t studied Lore so that she could still the flames. Yes, the fire had felt awful, but it had also felt powerful. She had felt powerful.
No way, Rin. Is this the start of your downfall?
“What does it matter? They’re coming, and we’re staying, and at the end of the day whoever is alive is the side that wins. War doesn’t determine who’s right. War determines who remains.”
“The power would consume you,” Jiang said harshly. “That’s what fire does.
EXACTLY. THINGS ARE GONNA GET UGLY REAL SOON ISTG. RIN IS STILL PUSHING IT.
She registered nothing. Just a temporary shock, then the grim realization that she needed do this again, and again, and again.
OH NO
Nezha met Rin’s eyes, and then wrenched his sword out of the soldier’s back.
Bruh, what on earth is happening?
Jiang stood before them, his white hair hanging still in the air as if he had been struck by lightning.
Jiang, I knew we can always count on you!
Who controlled whom? Was it the soldier who had called the god, or the god in the body of the soldier? She didn’t want to be possessed. She wanted to remain free.
It was utter carnage. It was beautiful.
HELL NO
Altan was so solemnly competent, so casually brilliant, that all she wanted was to please him. He was strict in his command, sparing with his praise, but when he gave it, it felt wonderful. She wanted it, craved it like something tangible.
“I bet he’s always been like this. Old man in a young man’s body. You think he ever smiles?” “Only once a year,” said Baji. “Accidentally, in his sleep.”
LOL not you guys ganging up on Altan.
“Great danger is always associated with great power. The difference between the great and the mediocre is that the great are willing to take that risk.”
Their eyes met under the moonlight. Rin’s heart leaped.
OMG, I'm still shipping these two!
He gazed into the chimei’s tiny face, Khudali’s face, entranced.
SHIT IS IT HYPNOTIZING HIM?!
Altan didn’t answer. He took two steps forward and struck her across the face.
WTF
“But I’m not like the others. I’m reasonable. I don’t want to hurt you. I just want your cooperation.”
Have Altan always been like this?
Warfare was about absolutes. Us or them. Victory or defeat. There was no middle way. There was no mercy. No surrender.
“It’s easy to be brave. Harder to know when not to fight. I’ve learned that lesson.”
Go, easy on him Rin.
“That isn’t why—I’m not . . . We don’t need him. We’ll wake the others. They’ll fight for me. And you—you’ll fight for me, won’t you? Rin?”
TRAUMA BONDING, THIS IS GOING TO BE A MESS
“I will not sacrifice the world for the sake of this island.”
Not AOT all over again
For the sake of her vengeance, it was worth it. This was divine retribution for what the Federation had wreaked on her people. This was her justice.
What are you doing, Rin???
