A Wizard's Guide to Defensive Baking
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4%
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Bob is my sourdough starter. He’s the first big magic I ever really did, and I didn’t know what I was doing, so I overdid it.
32%
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bacon-brained.”
40%
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The author, I thought gloomily, had clearly never met a capital letter he didn’t like.
41%
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My forearms were really strong from smacking all that dough around, as I’ve said, but my biceps were no slouches either.)
44%
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I wondered what Spindle and his sister Tibbie had gotten up to, before the Spring Green Man had showed up and put an end to her career.
49%
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when you put “Duchess” in front of somebody’s name, they become sort of permanently middle-aged.
56%
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and that would be the end of a bread wizard named Mona who just wanted to make really good sourdough and muffins and not get messed up with assassins and politics
64%
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These experiments made my head hurt, but in a good way.
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My gingerbread man got very jealous. I went downstairs and found him giving orders to the lesser gingerbread men. One by one, they climbed up a shelf and did a swan-dive into Bob’s bucket.
66%
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Everyone had failed at every step and now Spindle and I were heroes because of it.
69%
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If you have ever prepared for a siege in two days, then you know what the next few days were like. If you haven’t, then you probably don’t. Well…a big formal wedding is about the same (and because we do cakes, I’ve been on the periphery of a few), except that if things go wrong in a siege you’ll all die horribly, and in formal weddings, the stakes are much higher.
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Golems. I hadn’t thought of them that way before.
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“Boiling oil? More trouble than it’s worth.
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Ah. Of course. The Golden General was sending me letters now. Naturally this was the next logical step.
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In magic, creativity is as important as knowledge.
75%
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Outside the walls, however, it’s not a sharp transition with city on one side and country on the other.
88%
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a fourteen-year-old girl scowling ferociously into a bowl full of bread dough.
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“Battle can-can,” said the Duchess wisely. “Very old tactical maneuver.
95%
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She shouldn’t have had to be a hero.” “No,” said the Duchess. “No. No one should.”
97%
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It shouldn’t be up to a couple of kids and a madwoman on a bone horse to fix the mess you allowed to happen.