The Stranger Times (The Stranger Times #1)

by C.K. McDonnell

This was the age of science – because they’d done such a good job persuading the masses that magic did not exist.

‘Publication seeks desperate human being with capability to form sentences using the English language. No imbeciles, optimists or Simons need apply.’

Angsty the Teenager

‘Halloumi salad,

The Admiral’s Arms had three things going for it: location, location, location. It was close by.

Hannah’s polite request for a tray was met with, ‘We used to have one but somebody borrowed it for Princess Diana’s wedding and never brought it back.’

He liked Castlefield. It had the feel of the old. There was a sign up for the tourists, telling them it’d been the town from which the whole city had grown, having appeared on the side of the Roman fort of Mamucium

Long John was as Manc as they came. When someone did an impression of a Manc accent, whether they’d met him or not, it was Long John they were doing.

‘You could just use people’s names?’ ‘I could do, yes. But then I’d worry that the unwarranted rush of self-esteem it would result in might give the staff the incorrect impression that they’re good at their jobs. As soon as someone actually does something competently, I’ll let them know. It hasn’t happened yet, but rest assured, I am on constant alert for even the slightest indication that it might.

People hold a lot of false assumptions about hippies. For a start, they’re not the relaxed individuals people imagine them to be. If you were to leave two of them in a room for long enough, you could guarantee a heated and bitter argument. They all have remarkably entrenched ideas about how the world, the human body, and damn near everything else works. The only thing a lot of them have in common is a fevered certainty that the world would be a better place if everyone just listened to them. Only two weeks ago, he’d had to separate two middle-aged women who had come to blows over the Dalai Lama.

Simon had been assigned the nickname ‘His Lordship’ and then treated in a way that made it clear none of the other children were royalists.

towpath,

Sadly, such is human nature that peace is a rarely achieved ideal.

Psychics’ Convention Cancelled Due to ‘Foreseen Circumstances’ The 15th annual convention of Portuguese Psychics has been cancelled due to what organizers are calling ‘foreseen circumstances’. In a press release, they revealed that next week’s event will not take place because ‘if it did, something very bad would happen. We cannot give any further details, as unfortunately that would cause something even worse to happen.’ The organizers go on to explain that the cancellation has absolutely nothing to do with poor ticket sales.

Hannah had torn through the early morning traffic at a reckless speed, ignoring a couple of inconveniently coloured lights on the way.