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Malachi The taxi slows as we drive up a hill. “Entrance to the farm is up here,” the driver mutters. Or at least, I think that’s what he says. His voice is rather gruff, so he could easily be saying, ‘here is the spot in the country where I will bury your body’. I opt on the bright side and sigh. “Thank god for that. I’d have had less trouble finding the entrance to the stable where the Baby Jesus was born.” I look at the rusty gate and the faded old wooden sign that proclaims we’ve reached High Top Farm. “I think the stable was probably more luxurious than this. Although Jesus did get
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Fantastic opening! I have to laugh, again, though: I caught the end of a previous sentence (?) in my highlight, which apparently was lacking a period at the end, so this clip begins with "Malachi The taxi". LOL...
“Oh, you’re a model,” he says in a tone of relieved revelation. I quirk my eyebrow at him. “What did you think I did?” He shrugs. “Escaped lunatic,” he says casually,
“Blimey, that’s the biggest taxi fare I’ve ever paid,” he says. “Andrei is going to shit kittens.” “Hope they won’t chase the traumatised chickens,” I observe idly. Bobby blinks and looks at me carefully, as if assessing my mental health.
“Malachi, is that your phone ringing?” Cadan asks quickly. “No,” I say in an innocent voice. I pat my pocket. “It’s right here in the front pocket of my indecently tight jeans, Cadan.” I rock back and forwards gently on my heels and smoulder happily.
I can't begin to express how happy I am to be re-reading this story. What a treasure! (Preparing for the new Model Agency book coming out soon - so excited! Mal and Dean and Pip, oh, my!)
The two of them seem to be doing something very farmerly with a load of sheep, and the animals’ bleats ring out on the air like a load of old men complaining together at a bus stop.
I flick a quick glance at the recipe and curse. “Shit, I was supposed to be boiling the potatoes before I did this part. Why don’t these people write recipes properly?”
What a hoot --- and I agree that recipes should be written in the same order as the steps require. 😂Of course, reading the recipe through first helps...
Makes me think of the tests some teacher would inevitably pass out in the course of junior/high school, that would begin with "Read the test before entering answers" --or words to that effect.
The final instruction at the end would be to simply write your name on the paper and ignore all the preceding problems/questions. Those who followed the first directive got to sit back and feel smug, while those who ignored it and dove in finished with egg on their face, and too much effort expended.
