More Than Enough: Claiming Space for Who You Are (No Matter What They Say)

by Elaine Welteroth

The rush of finding out what you’re good at is priceless. And having the opportunity to actually get paid for doing it is, well, the dream.

I understood that the bigness of my life would be determined not only by the bigness of my dreams, but also by my capacity to trust that there is a Higher Power who would always take those dreams and multiply them. This was a reminder that there is a divine order, a divine flow to our lives. We don’t need to have all the answers. But our job is to keep on dreaming and trusting enough to put one foot in front of the other.

To keep moving forward. To keep pushing beyond whatever feels confining. To keep searching for where the magic is. To continue expanding, staying open to being stretched. And allowing room to be completely awed by how much better it gets along the way.

realized that they weren’t at all smarter than the rest of us. They were simply emboldened, floating on an ancient tide of superiority, buoyed by the fact that history had never told them anything different. MICHELLE OBAMA, BECOMING

You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. WINNIE-THE-POOH, POOH’S GRAND ADVENTURE: THE SEARCH FOR CHRISTOPHER ROBIN

“That would be wonderful,” I responded, feigning decorum.

It’s time for you to move, realizing that the thing you are seeking is also seeking you. IYANLA VANZANT

Harriette was my first example of a female boss who elevated everybody around her. She was early evidence that a truly confident leader stands in her power without using it to make others feel small. She ran the show with integrity, grace, kindness, and class.

I realized that if we aren’t vigilant, we can move through our entire lives feeling smaller than we actually are—by playing it safe, by unconsciously giving away our power, by dimming our radiance, by not recognizing there is always so much more waiting for us on the other side of fear. But when we are brave enough—to go there, to grab what we want, to tap into who we are—damn, it feels so good.

“If we aren’t vigilant, we can move through our entire lives feeling smaller than we actually are—by playing it safe, by unconsciously giving away our power, by dimming our radiance, by not recognizing there is always so much more waiting for us on the other side of fear. But when we are brave enough—to go there, to grab what we want, to tap into who we are—damn, it feels so good.”

If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring a folding chair. SHIRLEY CHISHOLM, FIRST BLACK WOMAN ELECTED TO CONGRESS

It was her relentless optimism, empathy, ambition, and diligence that I immediately related to. Chloe is a feeler and a doer—someone who dreams up goals and chases them until they are her reality.

In those days, magazines, especially beauty departments, were known to hire for two seemingly disparate tracks: you were either the “show pony” or the “work horse.”

“Nothing good can grow if you don’t nourish your own soil.”

There is nothing stronger than a broken woman who has rebuilt herself. HANNAH GADSBY, NANETTE

What I know now is that when we derive our worth from the relationships in our lives—the intimate ones, the social circles we belong to, the companies we work for—we give away our power and become dependent upon external validation. When that is taken away, our sense of value, and identity, goes with it. I became determined to win back the

“No matter how much you try to blend in, your race walks into every room before you do.”

As an FOD, sometimes just being yourself is the radical act. When you occupy space in systems that weren’t built for you, your authenticity is your activism. But doing any radical work that has the power to shift systems—especially from within a corporate structure—requires allyship. Before I could go from assimilator to disrupter, I had to find my voice—and build my tribe.

“Sometimes just being yourself is the radical act. When you occupy space in systems that weren’t built for you, your authenticity is your activism.”

When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid. AUDRE LORDE

In the age of the internet and splintered identity politics, imagery often speaks louder than the words—especially when it comes to beauty stories. Given that these braids originated in a culture where the women are dark-skinned, not being intentional about including them in this story was a critical mistake, one that I own completely.

In order to change the stories, you must change the storytellers.

And particularly in the business of image makers and storytellers, authentic representation begins with creating more opportunities for people of color behind the scenes. Because, as we well know, it takes more than a few token covers to incite meaningful change.

I got my editor-in-chief’s blessing to call an editorial team meeting to brainstorm out-of-the-box ideas for the issue. I saw a chance to use this issue as a case study: What did we stand for now? What kinds of stories could be told here that weren’t being told anywhere else? What would happen if we threw out all the old formulas and focused our efforts on carving out a new lane for ourselves as a platform that spoke directly to a wider swath of issues facing young people today? In a crowded new media landscape, one in which magazines were quickly becoming passé for our younger audience and where young stars were popping up on the covers of all the other women’s magazines, it was mission critical to rethink our approach. I felt an urgency to pivot. And the stakes felt high.

Social media had become a window into what our readers were talking about online: representation, intersectional feminism, environmentalism, racial justice, gender equality, LGBTQIA+ rights, sexual and gender fluidity, and beyond.

realized that the only way to ever disrupt this system was for someone at the magazine to advocate for new voices and, in this particular case, a Black hair stylist.

“In order to change the stories, you must change the storytellers.”

It looks great on the internet. THE INTERNET There is power in speaking your dreams into existence.

“Women aren’t taught to get comfortable with making people uncomfortable.”

We all come up in a world that is set up to make us feel that we are not enough—so we strive even harder to earn respect, we put in the overtime, we bend history, and we stretch ourselves thin to reach and exceed the expectations of the powers that be. We rise to every occasion. We strive for excellence. Because that is what Black women do. We take what we can get, and we make magic happen. We make lemonade.

In a society that routinely squeezes women and people of color into constricting boxes for approval, Boz is unapologetic about doing things her own way—and she doesn’t waste time being bothered by anyone else’s desires for her to tone any of it down.

In our business negotiations, Boz’s ideas were as bold as her outfits and her social media presence. She wielded her power differently than I’d seen before: She was about collaboration, not competition; innovation, not copycat ideas; genuine support, not backbiting.

They spoke without code switching, centering our voices in a way I had never seen play out in a business setting. These were subtle gestures that redirected the power dynamics in the room.

“This is your ticket. I saw it in their eyes,” she said. “They would do anything to support you. It’s just, that would never happen for a White girl like me.”

This was presumably her first time experiencing what it is to be the minority in a meeting, and her White fragility was already showing. It hurt most because of how close we had become and frankly how supportive she had been—especially in helping me bring this idea to life. It reminded me of that childhood slumber party, when I learned how quickly a sense of safety in a relationship could be interrupted.

As if I had not had to work twice as hard for the equal respect throughout my life—even now in this very seat of power that I was being asked to split three ways.

When we operate the way White power has operated for generations by opening doors for our own, is it considered nepotism? Or is it just leveling the playing field?

They say art imitates life. Would an idea like this have been greenlit and executed with such ease if Black people had not occupied our respective decision-making seats in media? Serendipitously, our Teen Vogue episode of Black-ish had a comedic way of underlining a new seismic shift in the media zeitgeist—and some of the myopic perspectives I was grappling with in my own office.

To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious, is to be in a rage almost all of the time. JAMES BALDWIN

wondering when does it stop? In my experience, no amount of money, title, or education makes any difference if you are a person of color in America.

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA

“The world is divided between two kinds of people. The people who divide people and those who don’t. And those who don’t are growing in number.” At a time when our world felt more divided than ever, these were the voices and the stories that gave me hope.

DERAY MCKESSON, a modern-day civil rights activist, came to speak to the leaders of Condé Nast that same year, he said, “We are not born woke. But rather, there are moments of awakening for each of us.” While the term “woke” became a defining term of 2016, I appreciated his refreshing explanation, which clarified that “wokeness” doesn’t work like a light switch. You don’t just turn it on and boom, “You’re woke!” Instead, it is a process of learning, listening, stripping away the blinders that privilege puts on, and exposing yourself to suffering that doesn’t always affect you in order to act from a place of understanding and empathy.

we could exist to create moments of awakening. At a critical turning point in our culture when so many of us were seeking truth and authenticity, we had an opportunity to mean more to our readers and to the world. We wanted to give a voice and an inclusive home to the most diverse and informed generation of young people in history who are smarter than they’ve been credited for, who care deeply about the issues of our time. By breaking down false binaries and inviting new voices to speak out on issues that matter to young people, Teen Vogue was becoming a media brand that validated and celebrated all aspects of their identities. This is a generation that wants to know how they can support the Black Lives Matter movement and learn about the best bronzers for their skin tone. Who want to be educated and not just entertained, who crave authentic representation, not just superficial tokenism. Collectively, we saw how we could expand the intersection where all of these values and interests could coexist.

There is no glory in a grind that literally grinds you down to dust. EVE EWING

I’d lost her in the day-to-day grind. In the process of becoming the woman I always wanted to be, I forgot that it involved becoming a whole person, not just the success story I had been trying to write my whole life.

I LEARNED THE HARD WAY that there is a thin line between being a hard worker and a workaholic—someone who buries herself in work and inadvertently avoids participating in her own life. In hindsight, it is clear that I have always possessed tendencies toward the latter. What began early on as a kid’s overcorrection to her parents’ struggles manifested into a fear of failure that drove me into a relentless, myopic race with myself, one that had no end in sight. I found myself in a pattern of perfectionism. Always striving, even for what would ultimately prove to be futile missions—relationships that became toxic and jobs I had outgrown. When you are invested in building something you believe in, and you know there is no safety net if you fail, it is all too easy to lose perspective. It is by no means a bad thing to be ambitious, but I needed to develop healthier habits in order to be truly successful.

When the music changes, so must your dance. It was the most beautifully worded truth, a profound lesson reminding me to trust my instincts, to let life guide me, and to never stay anywhere doing the same things longer than I was supposed to.

When the topic of self-care came up, Eve, an academic, writer, and visual artist, said: “There is no glory in a grind that literally grinds you down to dust.”

There is no glory in a grind that literally grinds you down to dust.