Network Effect (The Murderbot Diaries, #5)

by Martha Wells

“No, it says it’s fine,” I heard her relaying to the others on our comm. “Well, yes, it’s furious.”)

Thiago: “You trust it that much?” Mensah: “With my life, literally. I know what it will do to protect her, and you, and the rest of the team. Of course, it has its faults. In fact, it’s probably listening to us right now. Are you listening, SecUnit?” Me, on the feed: What? No.

I didn’t really feel like negotiating. I have a module on it, somewhere in my archive. It was never much help.

“I wouldn’t try to make you feel better. You know what I’m like.” She made a snorting noise, an involuntary expression of amusement. “I do know what you’re like.”

“No hugging,” I warned her. It was in our contract.

After spending my entire existence having to gently suggest to humans that they not do things that would probably get them killed, it was nice to be able to tell them in so many words to not be so fucking stupid.

(You know, if you don’t want to be manually eviscerated with your own energy weapon then maybe you shouldn’t go around killing research transports and antagonizing rogue SecUnits.)

ART said, I want an apology. I made an obscene gesture at the ceiling with both hands. (I know ART isn’t the ceiling but the humans kept looking up there like it was.) ART said, That was unnecessary. In a low voice, Ratthi commented to Overse, “Anyone who thinks machine intelligences don’t have emotions needs to be in this very uncomfortable room right now.”

She watched me search for seven minutes and forty seconds, then said, “Can I ask you a question?” I never know how to answer this. Should I go with my first impulse, which is always “no” or just give in to the inevitable? I said, “Is it contract-relevant?”

“Yes, please be careful. There was a terrible virus on a company ship and we all nearly died and SecUnit’s brain was compromised.” SecUnit’s brain is always compromised, ART said.

It had ART’s crew logo on the jacket, but somehow that didn’t bother me as much as usual.

“Surely they won’t suspect anything,” Ratthi was saying to the others at the bulk dock. “Who runs around with a friendly rogue SecUnit? Besides us, I mean.”

Overse added, “Just remember you’re not alone here.” I never know what to say to that. I am actually alone in my head, and that’s where 90 plus percent of my problems are.

Overse and Thiago watched me. I said, “Threat assessment is…” I checked it. “Never mind.”

A SecUnit. Killware. TargetContact said, A software ghost. I liked that. I had watched media with ghosts, though I didn’t have access to the files or titles anymore. I said, A ghost that kills you.

Perihelion: Please calm yourselves and stop talking. Plan A01: Rain Destruction has been superseded by Plan B01: Distract and Extract.

“Rescued by a…” Matteo trailed off and they all stared at me. Which was not what I needed right now, cut off from the feed and ART’s cameras and my drones. I said, “ART, I thought you told them about me.” ART said, I told them I had met a rogue SecUnit. I didn’t imply that you were every SecUnit ever mentioned in the newsfeeds. I think I was every SecUnit mentioned in the newsfeeds during that time, but whatever.

“Peri was going to bomb the colony with the armed pathfinders until they gave you up.” They picked up something (I suspect it was something that normally formed a vital part of my insides) and carried it off to show Martyn via the display surface. I had trouble believing that, but then I barely had the cognition to understand Timestream Defenders Orion right now (which is admittedly a pretty low bar) so maybe I was misunderstanding. “Are you sure? That doesn’t sound right.” ART hadn’t said anything, even to tell me how wrong I was, which was suspicious in itself. Ratthi said, “Oh no, it was very clear about it. Perihelion, why don’t you confirm what we’re saying to SecUnit?”

Ratthi might be my favorite of the humans

I was pretty sure I knew what decision it intended to come to. My files were a how-to manual for fugitive SecUnits.

Whatever, the humans worked it out while I watched Sanctuary Moon.