You're Not Listening: What You're Missing and Why It Matters

by Kate Murphy

Calvin Coolidge famously said, “No man ever listened himself out of a job.”

Hearing is passive. Listening is active.

When you listen and really “get” what another person is saying, your brain waves and those of the speaker are literally in sync.

The more you listen to someone, such as a close friend or a family member, and the more that person listens to you, the more likely you two will be of like minds.

It’s the idea that our ability to listen and connect with people as adults is shaped by how well our parents listened and connected with us as children.

The French writer André Maurois wrote, “A happy marriage is a long conversation that always seems too short.”