Once a top chef, now a poor fisherman who has to work for his parents to make ends meet. Put that on my dating profile. Ladies will be swiping right in the blink of an eye. Lives on a houseboat, smells like crabs—but doesn’t have crabs, win—interfering brothers, and exceptionally nosy older sister. Used to cook but now eats soup from a can, willing to split the check with you but not willing to pay in full—sorry, but there’s only dust in these pockets—rocket of a cock, great fingers, and will eat you for nourishment. I’m a real fucking catch.
