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there’s no discrimination in death. I guess wearing rose-colored glasses is easier than dark shades.
We tend to hold onto stories when we relate to them.”
“I find that the books with the saddest endings are the best because it makes us feel. We don’t always get a happily ever after no matter how hard we work for it.”
Pain comes in countless forms. The worst is seeing what your suffering does to everyone around you.
Reality is ugly and painful and full of the kind of heartache that some books help you forget exist for a short period. I get to fall in love thousands of times over, a feat I’m afraid I’ll never accomplish if my illness brings me to Lo instead of my future husband.
Staying in the past means halting the future. I may not get one, so I want to at least try making the most of the present.
The trouble with time is that we only think we have it. It’s an illusion—an excuse to linger in existence. Some people use it to be reckless, others use it to hold themselves back.
“Sickness isn’t pretty,” I whisper. “It makes the person you love more than anything in the world into somebody different. It isn’t just a physical transformation, but a mental and emotional one. When it takes over, there’s very little in their control they can do. Whether you want to give Cam the time of day or not, you need to know that your father didn’t want you seeing him like that. And you know what?” I take a deep breath and shake my head. “It’s ugly. Watching someone you love die from illness is hideous and heartbreaking and so many other things.
Disease is the monster in the dark. It lingers, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. It veers its ugly head and takes what it wants, when it wants.
the feeling in my chest is deeper than anything my disease can cause, despite it being the very reason for the ache in the first place. Nobody wants to break their Mama’s heart…
“You can’t honestly believe the woman’s mother was the ladybug, can you?” “Why can’t I?” I challenge, staring only at Lo’s grave. “Sometimes we need those types of beliefs to get us through the day. Like when I see a rainbow, especially without any rain, I like to think it’s Logan.”
Who’s to say what’s out there and what isn’t? None of us really know.” So we pretend. We pretend our loved ones are still close to us. We pretend we’re okay. It’s not denial. It’s coping. It’s reassurance. It’s how we get through another day.
“Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It just means that it can no longer control our lives.
not bothering to worry about his warning. It won’t matter anyway, because Kaiden is…Kaiden. My Kaiden. The very person I need in my life to put things in perspective. Nobody compares. Nobody will get a chance to.
People are afraid of the truth. They don’t want to accept that bad things happen to good people every single day. People struggle. People die. It’s life.
We can’t change what’s been said or done. If we spend all the time on the negative, we’ll be angry for the rest of our lives. Why let it consume us?”
“Do you think he was afraid?” No elaboration is needed. “I think when he got to a certain point, fear eluded him.” “Like he welcomed death?” I shake my head, stepping closer to him and putting my hand on his arm. “Welcomed relief, Kaiden.”
“Don’t hide. You’re beautiful, Emery. You’re beautiful and you’re mine.”
I’m nodding, realizing this is it. I’m going to lose my virginity to the boy who’s made me feel thousands of different things since I moved in with him.
always be better than the real world. Fiction has a way of revealing the types of truths that reality obscures. There’s nothing that books can’t talk about, regardless of how readers interpret them. We can accept or deny what we want, but the facts are still immortalized on paper.
Dad’s throat bobs as he brushes my face with his thumb. “I love you, baby girl. Always have and always will.” So why didn’t you try harder?
“I wouldn’t redo anything, Mama.” She blinks up at me. “Because we can’t change anything.”
“But you,” I add, “were always there.” He allows himself to smirk. “Especially when you didn’t want me to be.” That’s when I needed you most.
