Fae and Fare (The Wandering Inn, #2)

by Pirateaba

Everything has changed. I feel it. This world is different now, and the stakes have suddenly gotten a lot higher than my single life. Someone has walked into the small sandcastle of my understanding of the world and given it a damn good kick. There are more people than just me in this world. From my world, I mean. There are more interdimensional travelers, more people from Earth*.

Lol in this building even

Well, it’s a good thing I used to read Youtube comments or I wouldn’t have been able to transform myself into an egotistical thirteen year-old with delusions of grammar. [batman] was a good foil, but I probably gave myself away there at the end.

:D who was the Scott dude tho?

She’s exactly the kind of person I don’t really like hanging around. Just a bit too friendly and bubbly and clearly not that focused. Okay, okay. What was I thinking about?

Lol

It’s not me. I don’t chat with people. I don’t talk. But today— Today is different. So I begin to speak. Erin blinks as I begin talking about running, frankly, and without sparing the details. “You had your leg shattered? By a moving—” She glances down at my leg. You can’t even see the scars. That’s magic for you. “And you went to the High Passes?

Oo

But her story calls to me. There’s something about Erin. I’ll think about it later. “Have you ever seen a Gnoll? They’re like giant hyenas that get really angry. And they sniff you. A lot. Have you ever heard one of them sneeze? So weird.”

Oo

Hundreds? Thousands? Tens of thousands? Ryoka felt something twist in her stomach. Humans band together. They make laws. They go to war. Perhaps other species didn’t do that. But humans did. And peace for humans is only an interlude till the next war.

Point

then the game and everything else blended into the nightmare. —- Ryoka looked like she was having a great time. Erin could tell.

Rofl

Erin flinched at Ryoka’s glare. She hadn’t known the other girl long, but Ryoka seemed to have two settings: intense and brooding. And right now she was practically vibrating with energy.

Oo

Pisces and Rags walked in the rear, theoretically furthest away in danger but hypothetically first to be stabbed in the back. But between Rag’s ears and Pisces’ paranoia, ambush was unlikely.

Lol

Or at least, one of the types of people on her hate list, which, it had to be said, was quite large. He was a prissy, self-important know-it-all if she was any judge. Exactly the sort of person who talked big and never delivered… And who was right now risking his life to save Ceria and the others. Ryoka paused and had to rethink her thoughts.

Good

It was as if Ryoka had taken a step that was no longer there. She stared at Erin as the other girl continued. “I killed some other Goblins too, I think. Well, they were stabbing me so I hit them—and I killed some Shield Spiders, and then some undead. It’s not as if I’m an adventurer and go around killing things, y’know. But I had to. And the thing is, everything screams when it dies.” She looked at Ryoka. There was a hollowness in Erin’s gaze. A cold void.

:(

Pisces frowned at Ryoka. “I fail to see what you’re asking. I have raised many forms of zombies, ghouls, skeletons…” “But never anything else?” “Such as what?” “A zombie bear, perhaps.” “A zombie bear?” Erin stared at Ryoka in horror. Ryoka shrugged.

It'd Be handy

Pisces lost a bit of his swagger as he stared at Ryoka. “That was…quite well said. I see you have some knowledge of the transmundane yourself Miss Griffin.” “I’m no mage. But I understand bullshit quite well.” Erin laughed as Pisces turned red.

:)

“I didn’t mean—what I meant by that was—” It wasn’t how a rescue was supposed to go, Ryoka was certain. But it was real, and reality beat a fairytale ending every time.

;)

but she did when the jar of acid flew from behind. Gazi blurred out of the way and Rags lowered her hand and blinked at the empty air. An armored foot kicked the Goblin off her feet. Rags cartwheeled away and landed with a thump on the ground. She didn’t move. That was when Erin broke out of her stupefaction. She looked at Gazi as shock turned to rage.

Oh Rags

It headed straight towards the group, and for a second Erin thought she heard voices. “Look, look, sisters! A group of travelers out in the open!” “A band of warriors! The dogs and once-Dragons have been fighting!” “And humans! And the slaves! And even a dead thing!”

Oo

And also the group of hovering creatures that swirled and swooped in the air above Erin and Ryoka’s heads. “They’re not dead! The half-breed lives!”

Which one? Ryoka?

“Now that we know we’re both from the same world, well, we should cooperate.” “Of course. I mean, that’s obvious. Why wouldn’t we?” Erin looked confused. Ryoka debated for an instant going into backstabbing, potential dictators, selling out the secrets of their world…and realized Erin wasn’t that type of person. She really had few evil bones in her body, if any. “Well, there are a lot of dangers.” Ryoka said it lamely, as if Erin hadn’t just smashed her way through

Oo

Still, if there was a time for her jaw to drop, it would be now. “You were invited to…Cuba? For a chess tournament?” “When I was a kid. I was really into chess back then. Now…I mean, I was just getting back into it when I appeared here.” Erin shrugged modestly, as if being invited to an international tournament as a kid was no big deal. And maybe it wasn’t, for her.

Oo

Erin’s face fell. “You mean I’m never going to see Legolas?” “Doubtful.” Ryoka felt a tinge of regret just saying that. Not for the fact that she’d never see a bunch of Orlando Bloom lookalikes – although that certainly wasn’t a plus.

:(

They sounded like names straight out of a fantasy game, rather than real life. But then, South America, North America, Asia, Antarctica, Africa, Australia…when you got down to it, it was pretty strange that over half of the continents in her world started with the letter ‘A’.

Lol

It was embarrassing. How many times had Ryoka wanted more responsibility, less parental controls, more autonomy, and a real challenge in her life? She’d wanted to have something to work for, to live for. But this was too much. This was crushing despair and incomprehensible madness. Where could they even start?

:(

That was the thing about Pisces. Unlike Ryoka, who didn’t read social cues that well, Pisces could readily pick up on unspoken messages. His problem was that he just chose to ignore them. Erin wriggled around in her blankets until she could both remain in her warm nest and glare at Pisces.

Oo

Toren heard Erin screaming and Pisces shouting something. He stared at the packed inn and estimated the density of the snow. Toren’s mouth opened and he seemed to sigh. Then he walked into the inn and began to dig as the snow began to fall even harder.

Poor Toren

The fairies – or perhaps faeries depending on how you wanted to think of them – were chaos and mischief unleashed. They didn’t seem too antagonistic, but they caused trouble wherever they went.

Oo

there’s only silence. Even the faeries are staring. “She laughs like an evil thing, doesn’t she?” “’Tis the sound of a coven of witches and Hekate herself!” I don’t have an evil laugh. But I pat Fals on the shoulder anyways, to reassure him. “Thanks. I needed that.”

Oo

That’s how I explained my creepy laughter to Garia after we left the Guild. I mean, creepy according to her. And not really creepy—I’m sure she was exaggerating when she said that. Unsettling, perhaps. Dramatic—yes. But I don’t have evil-laughter. No matter what those damn faeries say.

;)

It’s as if I told her the world was round. Or…is it flat over here? Never mind. Garia’s used to a world that isn’t mapped out with satellites and Google cars, but I’m not. The idea that there’s something to explore, something to find that’s completely new is what burns through my veins.

;)

I look sideways at Garia and realize she’s looking at me to see if I react to her friend’s appearance. Well, fuck. Whoever said humanity would band together if ever confronted by a new species was clearly mistaken.

:(

…Yep. She’s a business person, alright. It feels like I’m being attacked by the salesperson of the year at a shop.

;)

But hell, I’m pretty sure this Octavia’s not going to poison me, so I take a sip. The potion tastes— Well it tastes like someone scraped regurgitated corn mash onto my tongue and flavored it with prunes. Rotten prunes. I nearly gag, but swallow the terrible stuff.

Oo

Octavia blinks, but I don’t. The best way to deal with someone like this is to shut them down hard.

:)

“I’m going to buy more stuff. Food. And I need to check on my friends. While I’m gone, I want you to find more firewood. Got it?” The skeleton nodded, but hesitated. He looked around aimlessly. Erin realized he didn’t know where to find the firewood. “I don’t know where any is. Go find some trees.”

A -- rude Erin B -- warn him about the explosive ones?

get to Krshia. Krshia knew about warm things. She had fur. Maybe Erin could hug her until she was warm?

Lol

But Toren was sure he’d done everything right this time. All night long he’d been pushing snow together like Erin had told him. He’d made a very tall wall, and that was good, wasn’t it? There wasn’t anything Erin could find wrong with his wall. “Hey! How am I supposed to get out?” Toren paused. Then he turned his head 180° and stared at the wall. Oh.

Poor baby

When the undead had attacked Liscor, Toren had been quite worried. He’d been worried Erin was going to replace him with a ghoul, or maybe a zombie or another skeleton. He’d been quite relieved when it turned out they were all trying to kill her.

I know where this goes but right now poor baby Toren.

They usually had an entrance and an exit that didn’t involve a hole in the ground. There was a way out. All he had to do was find it. And if there were things that wanted to kill him, that was fine. Toren clenched his fist as the armored warrior began to thunder down the hall towards him. He ran forwards, mouth open wide in a wordless shout. He was going back.

:(

Erin couldn’t describe it. It was so familiar. Why? It was a pattern in her life. Something bad happens. Get sad. Nearly die. That’s how it went.

:(

She walked back to the empty hill where her inn had once been, staring around, wondering what it was. And then she realized it as she sat at a table. Erin looked around and didn’t see him. Toren.

:( at least she finally noticed

The smell surrounding me is unbearable, and that’s coming from a girl who’s been sprayed by a skunk more than once. Question: what is the most feared animal from our world? I sort of gave it away, but it’s the skunk. Fuck hippos or great white sharks or army ants. Skunks instill a kind of fear in suburban neighborhoods that you just can’t match.

:D

Erin raised the arrow made out of wood and planted it deep in the ground where her inn had been. It pointed roughly towards her new inn. Toren would see it, and come back. She was sure of it. Erin was so sure that she made three more signs and placed them on hilltops around her inn. Just in case

:)

But. This was a hamburger. It had stayed as one of world’s greatest and most popular foods for over a century. The people of this world might have cuisine, but Erin had fast food. Their taste buds would never know what hit them.

:D

She knew these trees. They were death. In fairness, Goblins classified almost half of the world as ‘death’, but they had a far more nuanced view of death than other species. Their species had over twenty words for death, and that meant they could define death in an almost unlimited number of ways.

:(

Burying the head was a sign of deep respect. It meant that the Goblin who’d died was not merely food. The Goblins would have buried their last Chief if Klbkch hadn’t done it for them.

:(

I almost wonder if winter isn’t so much a world-wide event so much as a rolling condition that sweeps across continents, possibly changing course at the whims of the faeries. That would be quite interesting.

Oo

Slow down, Ryoka. Any more of this and you’ll turn into a conspiracy nut. Not that all conspiracies are wrong. Turns out the government is spying on us, half the wealth of the world is held in the hands of just eight people, and magic and other worlds do exist. Yeah. I’m in trouble.

;)

They gape at me, and I feel my lunch coming up. “I—” “Oh wait, it’s the sockets, isn’t it? Sorry.” She closes her eyelids and I can finally look away.

Oo

My hand clenches. Can I punch her? She’s not too far away. I could turn her stupid face into a paste before anyone could stop me. But—no, damn it. I can’t do that. I loosen my hands and force myself to smile at Persua. She wants to use words? I can do words.

Words like no one else...get her Ryoka!

But Val had shattered that illusion. He could run twice as fast as she could. That wasn’t just cheating. It was reinventing what it meant to be human. If people could beat horses without machines… Maybe it was time to rethink her ideals. If that was what Ryoka could attain, maybe…

;)

And of course she just had to sing “Can’t Stop The Feeling”. Ryoka had forgotten she had that song on her iPhone. Why? Oh, right, because it was catchy. Ryoka couldn’t help it. She moved her feet to the song. Just a bit. …She might have danced with a Gnoll, and found herself competing to see who could perform more tricks with Relc.

:)