A Libertarian Walks Into a Bear: The Utopian Plot to Liberate an American Town (And Some Bears)
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If Jessica Soule had known how close the bears were, of course she wouldn’t have gone outside that afternoon, no matter how damn hot her living room got. If she had known, the whole cat-eating affair might never have happened. Soule says that the summer
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“What’s the endgame of capitalism, if not a big fat white man sitting on top of a pile of bloody bones with no one around him, crying because nobody’s around to make him a sandwich?”
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“These assholes,” he rants, “these idiots who walk around open-carry, when there’s no reason to be open-carrying. You’re making people uncomfortable. You’re making them anti-gun. You’re making them vote against guns. You’re costing us our fucking gun rights. You’re not being responsible. You think you’re a fucking cowboy who likes to walk around with a gun on his hip because it makes you feel like you’ve got a big dick. No. No. Put that under your fucking jacket. If you really feel you need one, put it under your fucking jacket like a normal human being. Respect other people’s sensibilities.”
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“They don’t recognize,” he said, “that the town was already free.”
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I also thank the bears, who, during several wild encounters, have not eaten me. Yet.