The Shadow Friend

by Alex North

It occurred to me now that I had wasted so many years, and that there was so much I wanted to say to her while there was still time for her to hear.

Ditto, but I won’t, as sometimes things should stay in the past, a box, sent out to space

I thought about how different things might have been between us if Charlie and Billy hadn’t done what they did. What altered course my life might have taken – and where my mother and I could have ended up, in place of this moment right now. Damn you, I thought.

Straight to the heart, could of been pulled right out of my life and put into the book. Somethings can never be changed, be fixed, and they can also never be forgiven or forgotten.

Amanda stared at the pitch-black woods before her now. The Shadows, they called them here.

Throughout this book the author has managed to breathe an eerie life into literary woods, strong enough, that if I was reading a paper edition, would be an ironic conundrum in & of itself.

The second woman – she knew he was married, of course,

A little something the spidey web has remembered from book 1 - It always ends where it starts…

I didn’t see another soul; it was as though everybody had been removed from the world, and I had been left completely alone. There

That was like when I’d walk to the beach, it was still dark, no cars or people except for the bakery who had been at it for hours of course.

Jenny Chambers?’

Damn, well, I wasn’t expecting the prior highlighted ending chapter. Way to put a story within a story. I can’t really say anything as I don’t like ‘spoilers’ but what a whammy! This is one of those books that makes you think, rethink, then throw your hands into the air yelling “I give up!!” And I’m loving every microsecond of it.

The past and the present, superimposed. Not a line, I thought. A scribble. And my heart ached to see her. She closed the notebook and smiled at me.

I’m trying really hard to not let this get to me, but it’s a slow stride. No one was murdered, but someone did die, a very good friend & it was with me not finding her present from our past in time. She’d be the very first to say “get over it” “don’t worry about the past, or the now, your alive!!!” And she’d try to cheer ME up when it should be the other way around, but she was too full of life and not giving a damn about what others say. It seems the good always do get taken too early and again that should be the other way around. If I thought for a minute I could do it, I’d swap years with her, I’d go in her place and she could live out however many years I had left.

On the face of it, what I was thinking was madness, and yet something had clicked into place,

That is what many dreams do, mull over your life, your days, tv, friends, work. It’s all mixed together in the spidey web while we dream and while sometimes we don’t even know it, we get clarity on different things.

who had lived here for so many years was gone now, and the building itself was grieving for the loss.

Mine would probably hold a party! The blackies (blackbirds) and monsters (sparrows) would miss me, well, miss the food, might only let it be saved to a fellow bird lover!

There was an impossible piece of magic

Or a slight of hand trick, wonder where his one is then… oh and I mean Pauls

The sacrifices parents make for their children.

Now I’m ‘older’ I can look back at how I acted & treated my parents when I thought I knew it all. I’m ashamed of an awful lot of things and wish I could take them back, there were reasons though that neither of them knew, but it still doesn’t excuse for it. I think my parents had their own happiness and not, and how throwing more problems on an existing fire didn’t help anyone. Oh how I wish we knew more so we didn’t say and do things we’d later regret.

35

Just a test Stephen King, Harlan Coben & Thomas Harris. Someone else stated on their review of this book, as though it was like part of these authors put together, a love child (I added love child) and it definitely is, and more, so SO much more. It seems like all the books these days claim to have “the best plot twist” the ‘you’ll never guess” twists “can’t put it down “ moments etc etc, well they can do that, say that as much as they like because Alex North delivers!

How old everyone has got, I thought.

God, tell me about it!

‘Are you sure you want to know?’ he said.

yes! Yes!! YES! spill the beans while I get a glass of water, been a while since a books made me like this! ;)

‘He really did believe

Ding a ling ding

One generation sacrificing so much to protect the next.

For those with good hearts, compassion, love, understanding & empathy towards others & how their lives, their days even, can be taken hostage by forces they’re unable to hold back, it’s always been the stronger to carry the weak when needed, but they do get something in return, a warmth of love inside that many wouldn’t even begin to think is justified, but it’s there, and one small light can always spark another.

It seemed as though everything he’d struggled and worked for over the years had been taken away from him. As if, in that single moment, he was looking back on his whole life and realizing every second of it was pointless and wasted.

‘Carl was her friend,’ he said again.

Umm yeah, that’s fine, all good, just one teeny tiny little thing, he DIDN’T do it, which means someone else did, and where are they now?! The spidey web is rolling her eyes and the the little red fishies think it hilarious…

My father used to burn things. It was one of the few memories I had of him from my early childhood. I seemed to have got through my entire adult life without the need to make a fire of any kind, and yet they had been regular occurrences back then.

I have memories of being in my Nanas old house, it had a fireplace in the lounge and I was totally fascinated with it. No idea why but I’d ‘play’ with it all the time. One of the few memories from when I was young.

It was like they had one picture and he had another, and some parts matched while others didn’t.

That would sum up the authors books perfectly.

I think when we’re young, consequences are things vague impressions of what could happen, but never to you. It’d be a friend of a friend whose brother died as they were driving too fast, your boyfriends sister who got caught shoplifting and had to pay fines. It’s never you, until it is.

I pulled the old chicken wire away from the posts and trampled it down.

With cuffed hands?

After

Not sure I like the ending of the last chapter. Or maybe I should say the beginning of this one.

Graveyards might have housed the dead below the ground, but what lay above was always for the living; they were the places where people came to deal with the break between what their lives had once been and what they now were.

I wonder what says about those who wish to be cremated, and their loved ones who complete that wish and spread the ashes across land, water or space. I has my Dads ashes here for a few months and I went into a downwards spiral of grief & anger and it wasn’t until my Mother forced the issue, literally walked in and forcibly took his ashes, along with other things, that I began to climb out. So was it me? My emotions? My situation? Or was it something else?

If she wanted to cry, she fucking well would.

Not many authors can manage to swear, but have it come across like a divine blessing, this one does.

and the undergrowth around him soaked with blood.

Wussy, should of used something like the femoral artery, it’s quicker.

I think it was just that what happened had raised a curtain of silence between us that made it impossible to say certain things out loud.

Great, the authors channeling my life with the sad bits