The Life That Mattered (Roe & Evie, #1; Life, #1)

by Jewel E. Ann

I shook off his attempts to take another step, pressing my backside to the windowsill. “You are emotionally dead. I hate that I feel so indebted to you. I hate that you think everything can be solved with a check. I’m so glad I have Ronin and my kids because you are not my friend anymore. You don’t understand that what I need are people who will try to fill this huge fucking void that will be left in my heart when my mom dies. A void that can’t be filled with all the money in the world. And I hate that you’ve taken my best friend from me. I hate all of it, and I fucking hate you right now too.”

The muscles in Graham’s jaw pulsed steadily as he stared at me. Finally … finally I could see the tiniest hint of emotion in his eyes. Maybe saying that I hated him was going too far. Maybe telling Lila that I’d message her when my mom died was going too far. But as badly as words could hurt, the unspoken words hurt more. I’d rather be emotionally invested to the point of stepping out of bounds than emotionally dead. At least I cared enough to be hurt and angry … and say it.

Heart palpations stole my breath, making it hard to find enough oxygen. But I had to find that next breath. I knew at some point I would no longer have to be strong for anyone else, and I would crumble into a cloud of despair. Until then … I moved like a wave, miles off the shore, waiting for my turn to crash … break … and disappear.