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This was my freaking body and I loved the shit out of it. And if I kept telling myself that, maybe one day I’d believe it.
We were family. “Can you not call me your sister all the time?” Why didn’t she just boot me straight through the heart?
“Can I help you?” “Sure, you can let go of Jules. My date.” “Jules?! Her name is Julia,” Chet snapped. “My mistake, I just go with what I call her in bed at night.”
Tomorrow, I wouldn’t be the dude who “happened” to be outside at the exact same time she was coming home, or used cookies as an excuse to hang out. Who does that? Me, apparently, I can’t help myself.
“Your lips make me forget about everything else. They make me forget about losing, about the hundred people in the hallway beside us, about anything not centered on this mouth. How’d you get so fucking sweet, Jules?”
At this point, she’d have to call the cops to get me to leave.
“I know there’s so much shit out there about women and their bodies and I don’t want you to think I don’t see you. I love your curves. I love your thighs and how strong they are when you wrap them around my waist.”
“How many times do I have to tell you, Jules. I’m into you. Whether it’s in letter form, cookie form, pole dancing form, sitting in your sweats on the couch watching TV form, or any other way you want to show me what you’re all about, I’m here for it. I’m here for you.”
“One of these days you’ll see yourself like I do.”
Would I ever be one of those girls? Who the hell knew? But I deserved to be happy just as I was, regardless of size, and I deserved the love of someone like Berk. And I wasn’t going to let my doubts about my self-worth get in the way of that anymore.
But just because someone’s your family, that doesn’t mean you can keep hurting them over and over again and get away with it.
“You’re too easy to please.” “Only when it comes to you.”
