All the Truths (Lies & Truths Duet, #2)

by Rina Kent

There has been a constant ache in my chest since I finally realized the painful truth: we live in parallel lines. Our worlds are never meant to cross. We were never meant to be.

When I meet his gaze, my movements are slow and almost robotic. In my attempts to stop myself from crying, I’ve turned numb. The hot sun above might as well become a gray cloud. I feel nothing, see nothing, and smell nothing. The world has suddenly become colorless, and I have no idea if I want the colors back.

Then I got fucking angry at myself for letting her crawl under my skin this way. She’s been doing it subtly, but it’s there. Every time I wake up, she’s the first person who comes to mind. And to my fucking dismay, they’re not thoughts about the best way to destroy her. No. They’re thoughts about her.

“I lived well with Daddy, Rai.” Tears glisten down her cheeks. “We didn’t have to run like you and Mom. We didn’t have to eat leftovers or sleep on the streets. I want you to have that. I want you to have my life.” “Reina…” I choke. “You’re Reina now. I’ll be Rai.”

Rai Sokolov. Daughter of Mia Sokolov. I’ve been on the run since the day I was born, homeschooled my entire life, and had no friends until Mom brought my long-lost twin sister to meet me a month ago. Then, they were both taken away. My mom and my sister. The only one I have left is my dad. If I want to be with him, I have to forget my life and embrace another one.

People need to see me, not Rai or Reina, a Sokolov or an Ellis, but me. Just me. The person inside who’s barely holding on by a thread.

“Don’t fucking test me or I swear⁠—” “Or what?” My head snaps up,

“You’ll attempt to kill me like on the roof, in the classroom, or in the locker room? I know it was you. I heard what you said to Arianna on her death anniversary. I know you’ll make me pay for whatever the fuck I did. So stop pretending you care for me, whether I eat or starve, whether I lock myself in my room and die, or whether I disappear into the forest and never return. Just stop fucking pretending!”

“Well, wasn’t it?” I fold my arms over my chest, my nails digging into the skin. “You only pretended just to get closer to me and screw me over. You made me believe you were my savior when you were the villain all along.” “Drop your arms,” he growls. “What?” “Don’t give me that high-and-mighty Reina act. I’m not everyone else, so don’t you dare put up your walls with me, and drop your fucking arms when you’re talking to me.”

I need my arms around my chest. I need protection and walls. I need everything I can get when I’m dealing with Asher.

I’m not a coward; I’m a fighter. I fought all this time, didn’t I? With Mom and with Reina and then with Dad and without him. I’m still fighting. I’m still trying to chase the gloomy cloud away. Cowards don’t do that. Ever.

“What the fuck are you doing, Reina?” “That’s the thing, Ash. I was never Reina.” “What?”

“My name is Rai Sokolov and I’m Reina’s twin sister. I switched places with her when we were twelve. After Mom kidnapped her, we took each other’s identity. She went with the Russian mafia that chased me and I came to live with Dad.”

“I’m not from your world. I’m just a runaway, a nobody who couldn’t save her own sister. So if you want to kill me for whatever the fuck I did to you, stop playing games and do it alrea...

“I don’t give a fuck about your name. You’re the only Reina I know.” He reaches out his hand. “Come the fuck down.”

“Don’t you want me dead?” “Come down. Now.”

Then I recognize that somber look in his eyes. Fear. Pure, raw fear. He doesn’t want me to jump.

“If you don’t want me dead just yet, can you let me search for my sister first? I’ll do whatever you want once I find her.” He says nothing. “Please…” I soften my voice.

He grabs me by the wrist and pulls me down so hard I shriek, thinking I’ll topple over the edge. Instead, I land in the midst of strong arms.

He places both hands on my cheeks and wrenches me away from his warmth to hold me at arm’s length. “Don’t you dare fucking do that again, understood?”

“What happened to what you said? The part about how I don’t deserve for you to sacrifice yourself for me or anyone else?” He shakes me hard as if he’s jamming those words inside me. “Snap the fuck out of it.”

Are you there? His reply is immediate. Cloud003 For you, always.

I stood on the edge of a roof today and threatened to kill myself. I didn’t mean to, you know. I only wanted to bargain for something else, but as I stood there, a pull kept tugging me.

“I don’t belong to someone who wants to hurt me.” I might be inexplicably attracted to Asher, but I’ve never, not once, forgotten what he did to me. That fear was wild and raw and I can almost feel how I hung on the roof or how these same fingers choked me with the intent of ending my life.

I keep coming back to her whether I like to or not. She has me under some black magic. It’s in the way she looks at me like she never looks at anyone else. Like I’m her one and only.

This woman is my hell and I’m ready to burn.

The sounds she makes are enough to make a priest sin. Reina is fucking temptation incarnate.

“I…I love Asher.” “I know that.” “No.” She meets my gaze then quickly averts it to stare at her lap. “I’m in love with him, Rei. Not like a sibling, but as a man.”

Uhh wut.

Aiden King is the last person I need with my current mood.

AIDENNN

“What if, after you chase and conquer, she still doesn’t want you?” “Then you’re not doing it the right way. Tie her to you and make her see you. If she doesn’t like what she sees, make her like it.” “What if she never does?” “Then you’re a fucking loser and probably never deserved her in the first place.”

“As much fun as it’s been talking to you, I’m going back to my wife. She’s been asking about you, and this is a friendly reminder not to call her. If you do, I’m flying there and cutting out your tongue.” The line goes dead. Dick.

Love him

I place her on the chair near the edge—the same edge she threatened to jump from not so long ago. Reina’s eyes widen as if she’s coming to a realization. She pulls her knees to her chest and visible goosebumps cover her bare shoulders and arms. She gulps while staring up at me. Even I don’t know how I look right now. All I know is this ends today. Every. Fucking. Thing. Just like everything ended three years ago.

Uhh whatcha doing dude

“She laughed, Gray.” A sob rattles in the air as tears fall down her neck and soak the hem of her dress. “She laughed at me and asked if I was serious. She said my brother and I are so fucking delusional and made fun of me. Why did she make fun of me?”

Tf?

“Why both of us?” I whisper. “You only need to kill me.” “Shut the fuck up, Reina.” “Why?” I cry. “Just why? Because you don’t hate me as much as you tell yourself? You can’t hate me? You want to be with me?”

“Because I can’t fucking live without you. I tried it and it was hell.”

Before he can say anything, I blurt, “I didn’t make up the memory. Dr. Anderson said it’s not possible.” “I know.” His voice is quiet, pained even. “You…do?” “Yeah, I speak to your doctors.”

Jason is also Cloud003. He befriended me, fucked me, and was there for me in the most convenient times. He was also there right before Arianna killed herself. It can’t be a coincidence, right?

“Not me.” His voice is low, deep, and so raw I feel it to my soul. “I like it better when you’re natural and uncut. Those masks will suffocate you one day. They’re not you.”

I slip my hand into his, threading our fingers together. He stares at my expression then at our linked hands with slight awe on his face. “I guess I never did this before either?” I ask. “You did.” He appears nostalgic as he strokes the back of my hand with his thumb. “When we were thirteen.” “But not after?” He shakes his head once. Damn you, Old Reina.

“You were the only girl I wanted to kiss since I learned what kissing is and the only one I wanted to fuck since I learned what fucking means. All the others were nothing compared to you. I couldn’t even get hard at the sight of them, and that didn’t change when I went to England. Every time I felt the urge, I pulled out your picture or thought of the nights we had together and jerked off to them. I might have wanted to ruin you, but I could never stop the need to own you, too.”

“Cloud because of Gray, my middle name. 003 because of the day I first met you, January 3rd. It’s the reason behind this room number, too—1003.”

I smile against his skin. Damn this man and the lengths he went to for this. I love you, my mind screams. I love you so much, and it kills me to think you don’t feel the same.

“Ash, look at me.” His gaze strays from the TV to mine. There’s so much pain in there, so many years lost on hate, revenge, violence. So much missed time. “It wasn’t your fault.” My voice is emotional despite my attempt to speak in a neutral tone. “It wasn’t our fault. We just loved her too much to notice it.”

“I’m so sorry.” His voice is barely above a murmur. My brows furrow. “What?” His arms wrap around me in a tight hug that nearly cuts off my breath. “I’m so fucking sorry, Reina.” If possible, his hug tightens more around me. It says so much more than his words are telling me. It says how much he regrets the past, how much he wished to never let me go. So I hug him back because I have those same regrets.

I let him carry me back to bed. We don’t speak after that. We just watch each other, limbs wrapped around one another as we fall asleep. We’re both wounded and need to recuperate.

“I can’t get her voice or face out of my head.” His words are low and filled with so much pain, they gut me.

I can’t stop the tears even if I want to. The more he wipes them away, the harder they fall. “Reina…” he murmurs my name like a prayer he’s been dying to say.

Now, I understand why Old Reina needed to do that whenever she went out. I didn’t like being put under the spotlight if I didn’t have some sort of shield. My perfect face and appearance were it. It was a defense mechanism to hide my true feelings. I was a pro at that.

“Are you running away from me, prom queen?” “No.” Yes. “You can’t leave me, not anymore.” His lips brush against mine in a brief, heartbreaking kiss. “You’re my world now.”

He speaks in Russian, and even though mine is rusty, I recognize the words loud and clear. We got her.