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He releases my hand and tugs me to the crook of his body by the waist. It’s the first time he’s touched me so possessively in public. It’s almost as if he’s announcing his ownership.
He brushes his lips against my nose. “It’s chaos.” My heart thumps so hard, I’m scared it’ll stop beating or something. Oh, shit. I’m not supposed to be so caught up in him like this. I’m not supposed to wish I’m still his chaos and that he’ll never ever find a replacement.
I commemorate every moment and every second. I document the time where I get to kiss him anywhere I want. Because real life will strike again. Real life will rip us apart. And the only place I can have him is behind closed doors.
He keeps his attention on the road, driving with one strong hand on the bottom of the steering wheel. God. I’ve always loved how he drives — it’s so effortless and masculine. And he does it with so much confidence, like he could do it with his eyes closed.
“Fuck,” he murmurs against my neck. “You’re messing me up, Silver. Why can’t I stop thinking about you for even a second?”
I might be his chaos, but he’s also mine. My chaos and my safety.
“You told me to go home. You’re my home, Cole.”
“So you can’t leave me alone or I’ll haunt you.” “You’ll haunt me?” he asks with a little smile.
“Because I love you, Cole. I’ve been in love with you since you found me in the park that day and pulled my hair and told me you wanted my firsts. I’ve loved you more through the years, and I hated every time I had to face the reality that I couldn’t be with you.” “I thought you hated me.” “That was my way of saying I love you.”
“You’re so weird.” “Not more than you. You’ve been a dick to me for a long time.” “That’s because I wanted you to stay interested in me. To never get tired of me. I beat you in everything just to see that fire in your eyes as you challenged me for a rematch. I beat you to keep you coming back to me.” My lips part. I didn’t know that. “Really?” “Really. I might have been in love with you for as long as you’ve been in love with me.”
“I love you, Cole.” I sigh. “Does that mean you’re mine now?” “I always have been.”
“I’ve only loved you. Just you. You’re my first and last.”
We’re everything no one should know. We’re kinky, we’re dorks, we’re nerds. Or, rather, Cole is. We’re in love. We’re happy. As long as I have him, I know I won’t need anything else.
“You’ll marry me?” “Is this because everyone else is getting married?” “Fuck everyone else. I’m asking you.” He kisses the top of my head. “I know it’ll be a long time until I actually marry you, but I want confirmation.” “Oh, Cole.” I spin around and face him. “Of course, I’ll marry you. You’re the only one for me.” “The only one, huh?” “The only one.”
When he demanded my firsts, I saved them for him. In return, he saved me his. We’re each other’s everything.
“One day, I’ll shout at the top of the world that you’re mine.” “And you’re mine, Silver, always.” “Always.”
“Daddy.” Eli tugs on Aiden’s trousers, awe filling his features. “She’s so pretty.” “Not bad for Cole’s spawn.” Aiden lifts his six-year-old son so that he can kiss Ava. He goes straight for the mouth.
And yes, I remember she had her first waltz when we were fourteen. I remember everything about her. I’m that obsessed with this woman. Addicted to her. Fucking in love with her and the beautiful chaos she brings to my life.
Our story might not have started in the best way possible, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. Silver is mine and I’m hers. In the past. In the present. In the future. Always.
