A Beastly Kind of Earl (Longhope Abbey, #1)

by Mia Vincy

Ventnor’s men sat like hairy potatoes, one eye on the ladies, the other on their tankards of ale.

Laughing my ass off at “hairy potatoes.” Bwahahaha

Oh, and Ventnor would be apoplectic with rage. Excellent.

“I s’pose you have an invitation,” the man grumbled. “I don’t need one. I am welcome everywhere.” “Because you’re an earl, I s’pose.” “No. Because of my good looks, charm, and cheerful disposition.”

Bwahahaha

“If you please!” Thea protested. “A jaguar is far too noble a beast to do anything so vulgar as that.” “You speak with great authority, considering you do not even know what a jaguar is.” Thea sniffed haughtily. “I do not need to be an expert to share my expertise.” “Fair point. Ignorance has never stopped anyone from talking knowledgeably about a subject.”

“You have helped so much already. I’ll figure something out. I have to,” Thea added, almost to herself. “I have no family, no money, and only one friend. I might win, I might lose, but first I have to try.”

and all Thea could do was wait. Oh, how she tired of waiting. For three long, lonely years, she had waited, waited for someone to come for her, waited for her life to fix itself. No one ever came for her. Her life never fixed itself. She had had to brew plans to fix everything herself.

Girl, same.

“Yes. Lessons in proposals, after your lessons in posturing, prejudice, and pomposity.”

“I have no interest in courting you, Miss Knight. If you yearn for pretty words and nice sentiments, you can provide them yourself.”

Bwahahah