Mid-Lich Crisis

by Steve Thomas

Darruk Darkbringer sat in his favorite brooding chair. Picking the right place to brood was of the utmost importance. It required the perfect mixture of solitude and visibility; after all, brooding was rather pointless without an audience. Snacks were also key. A good brood often took a very long time, and an essential part of the process was for people to stop by and say things like, “You haven’t eaten in three days. Have some bread. I insist.”

Picking the right place to brood was of the utmost importance. It required the perfect mixture of solitude and visibility; after all, brooding was rather pointless without an audience. Snacks were also key. A good brood often took a very long time, and an essential part of the process was for people to stop by and say things like, “You haven’t eaten in three days. Have some bread. I insist.”

He had become a lich by age seven, following his disastrous and final session of weapons training.

The table was outdoors, for one, and plotting was much better done in a dedicated room with a strong lock on the door. Plotting required focus, isolation, and wall to wall chalkboards. He’d experimented with cork-boards, pins, and yarn, but that felt too much like conspiring, which was a group activity and therefore something he preferred to avoid.