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rich-people fetish food.
expensive because it’s ironic.
a deli cat named Gusto.
extremely superstitious and prone to crippling anxiety.
seemingly inexhaustible reserve of rage
the chillest patriarch in the world.
makes weed seem high-strung.
not only haram but weirdly basic.
plays upright bass in an all-cat jazz ensemble
An only child with clown pubes.
all-city dickbags.
all I had in my head was a pulsing asterisk.
I care about everything equally until I care about so many things I get overwhelmed and care about nothing at all.
a lightning bug that forgot how to turn its ass on.
mysterious tiny envoys from the other side that smell of powder-fresh sunshine.
mallowy toothsomeness with a hit of surreptitious peach—or,
skintight cave-witch chain-mail dress
Which brings me to an age-old rule to live and die by: Never go to Guitar Center stoned.
It’s a Zojirushi, which is the Ferrari of rice cookers.
Fr
it’s clear that being locked in an idiot’s arms race of saying ignorant things is easier than having a real discussion.
heroes with suboptimal dental hygiene.”
“Trace amounts of bagel.”
omelets at the jewelry store.”
100 percent of music is either Anthony Santos or not Anthony Santos.
“Families are a trip,” says Lee. “You think you know them so well that you stay wrong about each other.”
it’s describing a color you’ve invented to someone over the phone.
Lawyers and courts are for adults, and right now I’m a far cry from one. I can’t adult. Most days I can barely human.
How did I let myself forget that going out sucks? Every night is exactly the same. Boring and expensive.
the satisfaction of popping a thousand yards of Bubble Wrap at once.
And then change the type to Futura Heavy Oblique because it’s the Supreme logo font.
medical-grade fancy-pants California digital weed.
But you don’t do that stuff at mom’s. You have your white friends stash it since most of their ex-raver parents smoke weed with them anyway.
I didn’t want to fight either until the option to fight was vetoed without discussion.
You don’t get to start over every day; you get to keep going.”
