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May 19 - July 10, 2019
This is fighting with the Gods, says Epictetus, things are as they are because that’s how it’s meant to be.
“Seek not for events to happen as you wish but rather wish for events to happen as they do and your life will go smoothly.”
“Find me a single man who cares how he does what he does, and is interested, not in what he can get, but in the manner of his own actions.”
Attention: Taking the rest as it happens has nothing to do with resignation. Just because the Stoics said that many things are not within our power and that we should take any outcomes with equanimity does not mean that they were unambitious, feeling helpless, or into resignation. On the contrary, resignation is precisely against what the Stoics preached and practiced. Events do not happen as they do regardless of your actions, but rather depending on your actions. With your voluntary actions, you can co-direct the outcomes. It matters greatly how hard you train and try to hit the target, it’s
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Good things: All that is virtue; wisdom, justice, courage, self-discipline. Bad things: All that is vice; folly, injustice, cowardice, intemperance. Indifferent things: Everything else; life & death, health & sickness, wealth & poverty, pleasure & pain, reputation & bad repute.
These are called preferred indifferents.
they only seek those preferred indifferents as long as it doesn’t interfere with expressing their highest version.
Friendship is the most important preferred indifferent for the Stoics.
“Life is neither good nor bad; it is the space for both good and bad.”
“If you want anything good, you must get it from yourself.” – Epictetus
As Seneca puts it, “The wise man looks to the purpose of all actions, not their consequences; beginnings are in our power but Fortune judges the outcome, and I do not grant her a verdict upon me.”
We must refuse to let the hands we’re dealt decide over our wellbeing. The Stoics say that outside events and other people may have the power to affect how and even whether you live, but they don’t have the power to ruin our lives. Only you yourself can ruin your life by getting jerked around by things you don’t control and by failing to act as well as you’re capable of.
desiring what’s not within our power is the root cause of emotional suffering.
Changing outside events is impossible. Changing your view about those events is possible. So why not try to change what’s possible?
our actions are within our power, but not their outcomes.
“We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them,” as Epictetus tells us.
Viktor Frankl, who says in his book A Man’s Search for Meaning, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.”
The Mind Makes You Rich, Even in Exile
Disturbed or Invincible: That’s Up to You
For the Stoics, it’s clear that not events, but our opinions about those events are the cause of a troubled mind.
THE VILLAIN: NEGATIVE EMOTIONS GET IN THE WAY
“Once [anger] begins to carry us away, it is hard to get back again into a healthy condition, because reason goes for nothing once passion has been admitted to the mind . . . The enemy must be met and driven back at the outermost frontier-line: for when he has once entered the city and passed its gates, he will not allow his prisoners to set bounds to his victory.” – Seneca
Negative emotions naturally feel bad; think of grief, fear, jealousy, or strong cravings. So with the emotion in the driver’s seat, and with something inside feeling bad, our number one priority (unconsciously) becomes to feel better, and we automatically seek relief of the pain we’re feeling. The negative emotion orders us to do what makes us feel better and relieve the pain in the present moment, regardless of our values and long-term goals. We end up pushing aside our deep values, and instead walk away like a coward, order pizza and tiramisu, binge-watch Marvel movies, smash doors and
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Negative emotions can take countless forms. They can swallow us completely like intense anger which creates a sudden tunnel vision that simply lets us act out—bam!—and it’s happened. They can be much calmer like excessive grief which can leave us full of self-pity, depressive thoughts, and complete inaction. Or they can be very subtle like “just not feeling like it,” which can stem from different emotions and causes us simply to not do what we know we should be doing (ever heard of procrastination?).
Attention: Our human brain is built for survival, not thriving. Our ancestors’ main goals were to survive and replicate. Food and water were scarce. And there were many dangers, so they were constantly on the lookout for dangerous animals and rival clans. That’s why our brains developed a negativity bias—if they got caught by surprise by a wolf, they were dead. On the other hand, if they missed an opportunity for food, they still had another chance. So it was more important to focus on the negative rather than the positive.
And today, we still have these same brains—constantly checking if what’s happening around us is dangerous. Because of our evolution, we see obstacles much better than opportunities. It’s in our nature to worry about health, wealth, and social status. It seems we need those for survival. Therefore, we automatically compare ourselves to others, focus on possible dangers, and chase more and more stuff. So don’t worry if you think you’re always negative, that’s normal. That’s just the built-in negativity bias of our brain. However, that’s highly counterproductive in the modern world as, after all,
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We Want What’s Beyond Our Control “Passion is produced no otherwise than by a disappointment ...
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Donald Robertson says it well in his book Stoicism and the Art of Happiness,
A lack of awareness is the second reason for negative emotions to arise and take us over.
ego-wants-recognition mind battle.
Remember, for the Stoics, the only good lies in our voluntary actions, and our actions can only be voluntary when we’re bringing awareness into every moment.
With that awareness, we can try to follow Epictetus’ advice to endure and renounce in everyday situations: We should endure what we irrationally fear and dislike with courage and perseverance. We should renounce (or abstain from) what we irrationally crave through discretion and self-discipline.
After a long day of work and persevering with my tasks, I observe the desire to check some news. I’m well aware of the battle between the pleasurable desire and my deflating willpower, and most times willpower wins, but sometimes I give in to the desire.
“Let philosophy scrape off your own faults, rather than be a way to rail against the faults of others.” – Seneca.
HOW TO PRACTICE STOICISM?
Beware though, just because we’re fluent in the classroom doesn’t mean we’re ready for the real world.
practice, practice, practice! Because if time passes, Epictetus says, we forget what we’ve learned and end up doing the opposite, and hold opinions the opposite of what we should.
Every event in our lives presents a blank block of marble that we can train on.
Treat the practices as suggestions, not as rigid rules.
"What would have become of Hercules, do you think, if there had been no lion, hydra, stag or boar - and no savage criminals to rid the world of? What would he have done in the absence of such challenges?” – Epictetus
Difficulties are important. That’s what we’re here for.
God, says Seneca, “does not make a spoiled pet of a good man; he tests him, hardens him, and fits him for his own service.”
“A consciousness of wrongdoing is the first step to salvation,” Seneca
“You have to catch yourself doing it before you can correct it.”
Our voluntary thoughts and actions are by definition the only things within our control. And they only exist in the here and now.
Therefore, we should focus our attention on the present moment, undistracted by the past or future. Then we can properly confront the challenge we’re facing now, trying to accept it as it is, and choose a response consistent with our values.
Basically, we should be aware of our every step. As said earlier, we should watch ourselves like a hawk and bring the same attention into the moment as when we’re walking barefoot on broken glass. This focused and continuous self-observation is needed to practice Stoicism effectively.
Author William Irvine explains the cost bluntly: “The danger that you will spend your days pursuing valueless things and will therefore waste your life.”
Irvine describes what you’ll get if you make the investment: “Stoics can transform themselves into individuals remarkable for their courage and self-control. They will be able to do things that others dread doing, and they will be able to refrain from doing things that others cannot resist doing.”