Patron Saints of Nothing

by Randy Ribay

feel like I have the opportunity to do something that matters. Something real. Something for Jun.

Or for u

“Salamat po. Thanks.”

The Philippines will never have a space program, he said. When I told him that I will move to a country that has one, he said no, that I was born here and I would die here.

We could go to Jupiter, or we could go wherever you want. Anywhere but this planet.

Finally, he points with his lips at the poster of Allen Iverson on the wall above my bed—one of the very few recognizable Filipino habits he’s retained.

but I wonder if Jun would still be alive if our family had remained or if his family had joined us in the US.

Ruminating (this is a good storytelling detal)

“But as many good things as there are, there are many bad things, things not so easy to see from far away. When you are close, though, they are sometimes all you see.”

“Like this.” He gestures toward his box. “You need to put the heavier stuff on the bottom.” “Oh.” I begin unpacking everything to start over, ashamed.

My nanay kept walking. Everyone in my family kept walking. Everyone around us kept walking as if this woman were a ghost, as if she did not exist. Except for me, Kuya.

Every time I do, I think, surely, if I were in that situation I would be like the Samaritan and help the man in need. But how many times have I instead walked past?

But, it seems to me that there are so many older than us who are able to take care of those in need. If everyone did a little bit, then everybody would be okay, I think. Instead, most people do nothing. And that is the problem.

thanks to the international SIM card Mom set me up with before I left.

case he logs back in, I let him know I’m in the Philippines for the next week and a half and that I’d love to meet up and talk.

Predicting this will come back to biye him

Nobody thought to give me Tito Maning’s number,

Dude have you traveled like ever

but I don’t have any pesos, and I’m not sure taxis here will take American money.

U r in an airport u can change your money

Each time I do is like admitting to some deep moral failing.

It kinda is

Seeing the two of them without Jun stings.

Why stings ratger than hurts? Is j feeling insulted

But both sisters have the same eyes that their brother did, deep brown and bright with intelligence.

Lol that is so freakin generic

Angel says randomly.

Oof hes cold. Also thats not random. You were both talking sbout plane flights

and make mental note to buy copies of each while I’m here.

Angel and I chat

The girl seems to have an unhealthy obsession with my sister.

Only Grace and I look up.

“I know you mean well,” Tita Ami says, “but you should not have done that.”

They gonna get mobbed

want to tell my aunt that she’s wrong. But I remember what my mom said about how I can’t truly understand what it’s like to live here.

It’s like we’ve been dancing around broken glass and just stepped on a piece.

journal hidden under the mattress.

step out of my shoes, leaving them by the door—something my parents stopped making us do back home years ago.

Eww dumb American s

“This is where we have always lived. This is our home. We try to improve it, not abandon it.”

But neither does she open the door.

no way I’m napping before I have the chance to go through my cousin’s old stuff.

Dude they converted the room. Its gone

I guess many countries think that if they let us in, we will never leave. Maybe they are right.

spend so much time thinking about my troubles that I often feel very bad about life. But when I was handing out sandwiches, it made my problems go away for a time.

Second, the Church may not be all bad.

Third, the slums were not as bad as everyone makes them seem.

“It is nice of you to finally join us.”

Lol villain status

more a vacuum sucking us into Tito Maning’s judgment.

“It is not your fault. While you are here, you will learn. Grace and Angel will teach you some Tagalog. We will take you to important places.

Tito Maning seems to have this effect on me where I know what is right, but I feel too weak to do it.

if I believed that those who committed suicide really were damned forever.

It was like he actually wanted to know what I had to say no matter what it was, like he wanted to know me.

I sigh. I’ve lost the only piece of my cousin that seems to remain in this world.

One hell of anunderreaction

I wish I would have thought to do this even earlier, but oh, well.

Oh wells no biggie

I push it open, step inside,

Oof i hope he doesmt keep any work files in that office - mayhbe he has a locking desk or file cabinet?

in case someone should wake up

In case csomeone wakes up. Whp edited this

a collection of knives. So many knives.

Knivesz out!

blank calendar showing the wrong month, a small clock with unmoving hands,

These are set to a critical date - jun leaving?

crammed full of Toblerone bars and packages of those Ferrero Rocher chocolates that are wrapped in gold foil—maybe

Wpuld not be surprised if tito is selling drugs but i did just watch orange is the new black

“You will not find anything interesting. It is all boring police files.”

Lol

I expect her to ask why I think her father would go through my stuff and confiscate my possessions, but she seems to accept it as a possibility

Duh jun told ypou he did