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July 18 - July 20, 2024
Everything you say to a person is filtered through his frames of reference, biases, and preconceived ideas.
What is actually understood will, naturally, vary depending on who you are speaking to, but it is very rare that the entire message gets through exactly as you conceived it in your mind.
The stronger your self-understanding is, the greater your probability of adapting to the people around you.
Something is always happening in the lives of Red people. They can’t sit still. Idle time is wasted time. Life is short; better get going immediately. Do you recognize the type? Always on the go. So step aside; let’s get cracking!
If you need someone with extra energy, you may want to invite a Red into the team or project group. They fight tirelessly along when others have already given up—if they are determined to succeed, that is. A task that has become humdrum or meaningless could be totally ignored by a Red.
I call this phenomenon slog or split. If the task is important enough, a Red will go through fire and water to complete it. If he feels it has no purpose, into the trash it goes.
“Quick” is synonymous with “good” for Reds. If you are in a meeting and suddenly notice that one of the other participants is devoting his time to something completely different, it may well be a Red who has lost interest. If you look closer, you will realize that his thoughts are elsewhere—on the next step in the process being discussed, for example. Because Reds are quick thinkers, they move on long before everyone else.
When he learned I wasn’t, there was
no further need to talk.
Nothing is impossible. The impossible just takes a little longer. More than likely it was a Red who came up with that expression.
Because she sounded so convincing! Her facial expression was definite; her countenance was determined, and her voice did not quiver in the least when she presented her figures.
That’s the way Reds function. When they believe something, they let people know that this is the only truth that exists.
There are two ways to do this—my way and the wrong way.
Red doesn’t try to stick to his original point of view when he realizes that a better solution exists. He is a quick thinker and has no problem shifting his ground at short notice. One of the advantages of this is that he doesn’t reject other people’s ideas if he has none himself. It’s worth
looking into anything that can propel development forward.
They are driven by merriment and laughter. And why not? The sun is always shining somewhere.
People with lots of Yellow in their behavior are focused on creating relationships. They are outgoing and can be extremely persuasive. They’re enthusiastic, excited, and happy to talk about their feelings for others and, not infrequently, for complete strangers.
Yellows can talk to anyone. They are not at all shy, perceiving most people they meet as pleasant. They even see strangers in a positive light—they’re just friends you haven’t met yet.
Naturally, he’s upset when accidents happen, but he can’t stay upset for long periods of time.
When I heard about the accident, I was worried and called to see if he was okay. His answer? “It was fine! I just got out the other door!”
A Yellow doesn’t need to know a person very well before calling him his friend. Anyone who doesn’t actively dislike them they consider to be a pal.
If everyone were a driven leader, there would be no one left to be led. If everyone were an enthusiastic entertainer, there would be no one to amuse. And if everyone were a detail-oriented perfectionist, there wouldn’t be anything to keep in order.
A Green will always be more interested in you than in himself, and if perchance he should be interested in himself he would never dream of showing it.
Greens do this naturally. When having coffee, it’s quite normal for you to ask the people with you if they would like a refill. When other colors would likely take their empty cups to the coffeemaker, Greens would simply fetch the coffee carafe and refill everyone’s cup.
Lasse, a good friend of mine, is a truly genuine friend. It makes no difference how much he has to do; if anyone needs a helping hand, Lasse is there, ready to support him. Sometimes, in Lasse’s eagerness to help with other people’s work, he even forgets to do his own.
We chatted a little while longer, and in the end I finally asked him straight out what he really wanted. Then he revealed that he was standing outside the office in his T-shirt because he had accidentally locked himself out when he had popped out to fetch some lunch. I looked at the thermometer. Thirty degrees with light snow. We’d been talking for about fifteen minutes! I got into the car and saved him from freezing to the bone. Everyone else is more important. A Green never asks for anything.
Unlike Reds, who only listen when there is something to be gained from it, or Yellows, who usually don’t listen at all (although they will normally deny this fact), Greens hear what you’re actually saying.
One observation that often arises when I work with these issues in different organizations is that Reds, and Yellows in particular, must be good at retail and selling.
Blue has all the right answers. In the background, he analyzes: classifies, evaluates, assesses.
He is also a pessimist, sorry: a realist. He sees errors, and he sees risks. He’s the melancholic who closes the circle of behavior. Reserved, analytical, and detail-oriented are some words you might associate with a Blue.
The preceding example also illustrates another important characteristic Blue behavior. They’re generally very cautious. They often think safety first. Where a Red or Yellow would take a wild chance, a Blue will hold off and consider everything one more time.
It’s a fact that for the Blue, the trip is more important than the destination, exactly the opposite of a Red.
So let’s say someone discovers an oil stain on the floor. A Red approach might be to lambast the person closest to him and then order him to mop up the stain. A Yellow sees the stain and then forgets it but two days later is surprised when he slips on it. The Green also sees the stain and feels a little bit of guilt because it poses a problem and everyone is ignoring it. A Blue would ask, “Why is there an oil spill?”
If there’s a manual, then of course you have to read it thoroughly before you start. Reds, confident that they can easily do this, start screwing and putting together the various parts without even looking to see what’s in the rest of the box. Yellows tear up everything, exclaiming that it’s going to be great fun to get the furniture in place. They live in the future and can already see a clear picture of the new cabinet on the right wall of the bedroom with Grandma’s tablecloth and a lovely vase of tulips on it. They put each part together a little bit haphazardly, without much effort.
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Why do you think they wrote this stuff if it’s not meant to be done that way?” How do you reply to that? How do you argue with the instruction manual? It’s impossible to find arguments that a true Blue will accept.
Reds are quick and more than happy to take command if needed. They make things happen. However, when they get going, they become control freaks and can be hopeless to deal with. And they repeatedly trample on people’s toes. Yellows can be amusing, creative, and elevate the mood regardless of who they’re with. However, when they are given unlimited space, they will consume all the oxygen in the room, they won’t allow anyone into a conversation, and their stories will reflect reality less and less. The friendly Greens are easy to hang out with because they are so pleasant and genuinely care for
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Reds and Yellows tend to inflate their strengths and believe that they have no weaknesses.
Some people say that Reds are just belligerent, arrogant, and egotistical. They are perceived as unyielding, impatient, aggressive, and controlling. I don’t think this is necessarily correct, but I’ve even heard people speak about people with Red behavior as dictatorial and tyrannical. Suddenly the picture isn’t as flattering. The born leader reveals his blemished side. First of all, let me say this: Nothing said previously would necessarily bother a Red, because he is more task oriented than relationship oriented. Besides, everyone else is wrong. But let’s see what everyone else has to say.
Björn lost his license every so often because of his somewhat liberal approach to speed limits.
Because the way Reds communicate is so blunt and so direct, many perceive them as aggressive. This is logical, but at the same time this perception varies, depending on who becomes the victim of the Red’s forceful points of view.
“Why are we even talking about communication? It’s obvious that you say what you think!”
Reds can probably be perceived as extremely overbearing, but it’s important to note they are interested in controlling those around them, but not in controlling every specific detail of a situation.
At the heart of this need for control is a belief that they know more than anyone else. And because a Red feels he knows best, he will keep tabs on everyone around him to ensure that they all do the right thing.
If we look at how a Red communicates, we can understand why many perceive him as egotistic: • “I think we should accept this proposal.” • “I want that assignment.” • “This is what I think about it.” • “I have a good idea.” • “Will we do this my way or the wrong way?”
What’s striking is that, over time, none of this criticism will really torment a Yellow very much. On the one hand, he’s a bad listener, and on the other hand, he has what some psychologists might call a selective memory.
He simply forgets the difficult bits, and with his positive ethos he finds it easy to say to himself that he doesn’t have any faults or shortcomings.
Yellows have no problems delivering opinions, views, and advice regardless of whether they know anything about the subject or not. A Yellow has a generous approach to his own ability—when an idea pops up in his head, he simply opens his mouth.
The solution is to keep everything in your head, which doesn’t work. It’s not possible to remember everything. So inevitably the Yellow forgets and those around him think he’s careless. Missed appointments, forgotten deadlines, and half-finished projects all because once his mind has finished the task he doesn’t go backwards. He goes forward. Leaps to the next project. Deals with other things.
This is repeated in many different spheres. I have a few acquaintances who are hopeless at keeping time. They are always pleased and excited to think things up, but they are optimists when it comes to time. It makes absolutely no difference what time you suggest; they will not be on time.
What does he do then? Simple. Something else. He throws up another ball to juggle. The problem with all these balls is that he might be able to keep them in the air for a while, but he can’t get them down into the right box at the right time. Instead, he leaves the room and the juggled balls tumble down right into someone else’s lap.