Can't Text This (Texting, #3)

by Teagan Hunter

Python: Because she’s adorable as shit. Me: There is nothing adorable about human excrement. Python: Keep going, Monty. I love it when you talk dirty to me.

“That ass is what dreams are made of, baby!”

Python: Wow. You suck too. Me: I do, but you know that. Python: OH FUCK. Montana Andrews, did you just make a BLOWJOB joke? You little