Truman’s words stayed with me the entire time I was at Gourmet, but as the years went on I began to see them very differently. At first I thought of them in a wistful way, hating myself for not being more Truman-like. But I just didn’t have it in me. Was it because I’m a woman, trained to be a good girl and play by the rules? Truman had related that tale with a kind of glee. Why wouldn’t he? He’d figured out how to manipulate the system. And so, although I behaved with the grudging grace of a bratty teenager, each time Gina called, I went. But in later years, when I was throwing myself
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