“It looks fine. You’re not injured or anything. It just…you know, it looks and frankly smells a lot like cervical mucus.” “What?” That’s…I don’t know how to feel about that. He seems surprised. “I mean, that would be a good thing. Cerv—” “Please don’t ever say the C and the M words to me ever again,” I say, “I am far too gay to be able to cope with those words in association with my ass.”
