The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter—And How to Make the Most of Them Now

by Meg Jay

most therapists would agree with Socrates that “the unexamined life is not worth living,” a lesser-known quote by American psychologist Sheldon Kopp might be more important here: “The unlived life is not worth examining.”

We think that by avoiding decisions now, we keep all of our options open for later. But not making choices is a choice all the same.

Identity capital is our stock of personal assets. It is how we add value to who we are, and it is what we have to show for how we have spent our time.

I wish I had pushed myself to take some work leaps or a wider range of jobs. I wish I had experimented—with work—in a way I feel I can’t right now at almost thirty.

it is the people we hardly know—those who never make it into our tribe—who will swiftly and dramatically change our lives for the better.

A more expansive sense of interconnectedness rests not on texting best friends at one in the morning, but on reaching out to people that make a difference in our lives even though they don’t have to.