For most of us, though, changing our behavior is driven by our desire to fit in (people like us do things like this) and our perception of our status (affiliation and dominance). Since both these forces often push us to stay as we are, it takes tension to change them. Once you see these forces at work, you’ll be able to navigate the culture in a whole new way. It will be as if someone turned on the lights and gave you a map.
