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“A princess should not apologize to a guardsman.” “I’m Harper,” I say to him. “And I’m apologizing to you.”
Subtle, but there’s no question he’s the prince. Or maybe that’s just Rhen himself. He could stand there in a potato sack and he’d probably look like royalty.
“Do I look like a princess?” He steps forward and takes my hand. I think he’s going to lead me toward the stairs, but instead, he bows low and kisses my hand. “You look like a queen.”
“I had almost forgotten what this was like.” “Having someone to order around?” I say. “No.” Rhen looks past me at his guard commander. “Being part of something bigger.” Grey nods. “Yes. That exactly.”
“I’m not used to so many people staring at me.” “How regrettable. You surely deserve the attention.
Will you show me again?” I find it amusing that she keeps asking, as if I would not do this a thousand more times.
I would give anything to touch her face again. Her chin, the soft curve of her lip. I settle for gently straightening her aim.
“We have long thought the royal family had abandoned Emberfall. If rumor is true, they fled to save themselves, leaving us all at the mercy of the creature. And now, at the mercy of Karis Luran.” Rhen frowns. “Yet still you swore to me.” “Yes, Your Highness.” The woman bows her head. “You alone came back.”
“All of that, and you somehow believe I seek to humiliate you by dancing?” He slams down his beer stein. “My lady, I must ask—are you even thinking about what you are asking?”
“My own eyes see only you.”
I blink, though, and I see Isa in my mind, the way I found her after my first transformation. Her body was nowhere near those of the rest of the family. To this day, I still wonder if Isa was coming to find me. As if I weren’t the cause of the very destruction she sought to escape.
When you’re probably supposed to be back at the castle feeding me grapes and trying to get me to fall in love with you.” “Grapes?” I say. “Is that what it would take?” “The red ones are secretly the way to my heart.”
“I want to trust you,” she says, so quietly that her voice could get lost on the wind. “I want—I want to know it’s real. Not that you’re trying to trick me to break the curse.”
I do not understand how she can fill me with such hope and fear simultaneously. I pull her hand to my chest and lean in to her, until we share breath. My lips brush across hers. It is barely a kiss, but she is somehow closer to me, her body a pool of warmth against mine.
I draw back, then press my lips to her forehead. “I want to know it’s real, too,” I say.
I cannot remember the last time I’ve felt this longing. In truth, I’m not sure I ever have.
“Your Highness. My lady. Forgive me. I was going to stoke the fire in the bedroom.” What a coincidence, I think. I was considering the very same thing.
“I hope she does come here. I hope she comes to this room. Because I don’t care what I have to do. I’m going to end her.”
For the first time, I want to tell her about the creature. I long to be honest with her so badly that my chest aches. I do deserve this pain, Harper. You don’t know what I’ve done.
I’ve spent the last few days trying to protect her, not realizing that Harper could have protected me. I am unused to this feeling: some combination of gratitude and vulnerability and relief.
“It’s not always this stiff,” she says. “If a girl likes a boy she’ll rest her head on his shoulder.” “Does this girl like this boy?” My voice is light, teasing like hers was, but my question is genuine. Her blush deepens and her eyes sparkle in the light from the fire. She says nothing, but then she moves closer, until her body is against mine, and her head falls on my shoulder. Lilith’s torture has nothing on this.
I brush my lips against Harper’s forehead. “I will stay as long as you wish.”
She trusts me. I trust her. This feels more monumental than love. More precious. More earned.
A feeling has begun to grow in my chest, blossoming so slowly I almost do not notice it. It is not love, not yet, because that seems too far outside my grasp. It is more than lust and attraction, though. Something deeper. Something more real.
He gives me a look and holds out a fist. I blush and hit it with my own. “It’s a custom in Disi.” “I see.”
“I am pleased that you have found comfort and friendship. I am pleased our people seem united.” He hesitates. “I am not pleased that our time grows short.” Because Rhen hasn’t broken the curse.
She draws back a hand to slap me. I see the swing coming and barely have time to brace myself for the impact. But Grey steps in front of me and catches her wrist. His dagger sits against her stomach. “I am under no orders here,” he says. “And you will not strike the princess.”
“I will grant Grey the ability to cross the veil between worlds at his whim. He can return you home at any time, Princess.”
“She also knows that if we trap you here, you will never love me, and she will win. Yet if you return home, the curse will go unbroken, and she will win.” “She wins either way.” “Indeed.” I run a finger along her jaw and tilt her face up. “Which is why I’ve ordered Grey to take you home.”
“You act with such surprise each time. I told you I would give you anything within my power to give.”
“You plan for everything.” Untrue. I had not planned on how it would feel to let her go.
“I’m sorry I didn’t break the curse.” I lift a hand to brush the tears off her cheeks. Oh, Harper. I wish she had. Not because of the curse, or because of Karis Luran, or because of Emberfall. Because I have fallen in love with her.
“So you see,” I say, “if you have not fallen in love with me yet, I cannot see how your heart would change once my form does.”
I step close to her. Her breath catches but she doesn’t pull away this time. I lean close to feel her breath on my cheek one last time. “Do not remember this moment, my lady. The important ones are all that came before.”
“I’m not ‘my lady’ here,” I say. “I’m just Harper.” “You are far more than just Harper, regardless of location.”
“Scary Grey,” I whisper. “I’m so sorry.” His stoic countenance cracks a little. He sighs and touches a finger to my chin, then gives me a sad smile. “A princess should not apologize to a—” I launch myself forward and hug him. In a way, it’s like hugging a brick wall, but his arms come around my back and he sighs, his breath brushing over my hair.
But I will not end a near eternity of service by destroying the very man I swore …” His words begin to slur together. “I swore to protect.”
I detected a spark between you …” He looks away. “Was I wrong?” I say. “Or did you leave your knives and bracers with another?” “You are not wrong.” He hesitates, then speaks quickly, tripping over his words in a way that is almost comical. “That is to say—I have never acted to dive—to divert her attentions from you—” “I know.”
Grey steps up to me. He holds out a hand. I grasp it, and he grips tight. His eyes hold mine. There are no choices left. Every path leads to destruction. There is always a choice. “For the good of Emberfall,” Grey says quietly. I squeeze his hand. My voice shakes. “For the good of all.” I let go. I fall.
I walk along the dusk-darkened streets, my foot scraping lightly against the pavement because I’m tired, and think, I’m ready to go home. Home doesn’t mean here. Home means Emberfall.
We wait all night. Grey doesn’t show.
He tried to jump from the ramparts. Rhen tried to sacrifice himself to protect his people. Even in his last effort to beat Lilith at something, he failed.
Harper? Pain. Sleep.
“I don’t quite believe this,” Noah says finally. “I need you to pinch me.” “I’m too busy pinching myself,” says Jake. Noah gives him a rueful look. “At least you get to be the prince. I got stuck with healer.”
“Not in the past,” I say. “They call it the other side. Or maybe our side is the other side—somehow our world runs parallel to theirs.”
“Harp—what are you—just who do you think you are?” “Princess Harper,” I say. “And you’re my brother, the Crown Prince of Disi, so you’d better damn well act like it.”
“He will come after me before any other. I think even in this form he knows me—though he may not know why.”
“But she picked prince,” Jake snaps. “Get over it.” Grey ignores him. “The healer’s concubine?” Jake snorts, but twin spots of pink find his cheeks. “Noah probably would have loved that.”
“Rhen,” I whisper. He takes another step. I look into the monster’s black eyes and I see nothing familiar. But I can almost feel him.
He leans his face against me and breathes a sigh. I lean against him and do the same thing. “Oh, Rhen,” I say, and I realize I’m crying. He’s here. He’s not hurting anyone. But he’s still a monster. The curse isn’t broken.