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I shouldn’t really get into the comparison game with Emily, of all people. I love the woman but she makes the rest of us look like limp vegetation. She gardens, knits, reads at least a book a week, and has the enviable ability to eat like a frat boy without ever gaining weight. She also has Dave, who, aside from being my new boss (fingers crossed!), is progressive in an effortless way that makes me feel like he’s a better feminist than I am. He’s also almost seven feet tall (I measured him with uncooked spaghetti one night) and good-looking in an Are you sure he isn’t a fireman? kind of way. I
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“I’m not sure I’m man enough to handle Hazel’s brand of fun.” Emily swings a shopping bag over her shoulder and flashes me a toothy grin. “I guess there’s only one way to find out.”
“I realize that finding the perfect person isn’t going to be easy for me because I’m a lot to take,” she says, “but I’m not going to change just so that I’m more datable.”
“But at the end of the day,” she says, and puts her hand outside the open window, letting the wind pass through her fingers, “being myself is enough. I’m enough.”
“Hazel, a normal cruise is bad enough. You really want an all-you-can-eat buffet on a budget cruise?” “It’s free.” “Diarrhea is never free.”
“So, Dick—can I call you Dick?” “Many women do,” he says with a lecherous wink. “You see, Dick, I’m an elementary school teacher, but I also have a really crummy memory.” “That’s gotta be rough, Hazel.” “You’re telling me. Because of this I’m always looking for ways to trick my brain.” Hazel holds up a finger and counts off as she recites, “Getting Pretty Panties Ripped Requires Real Damn Initiative. Or—general, personal, possessive, reflexive, reciprocal, relative, demonstrative, and interrogative!”
“The only person I bicker that comfortably with is my wife,” he says, “and it’s a skill that’s taken years to perfect.”
Mom reaches up, running a muddy thumb along my jaw. “I get it, honey. I just want you to have the world. And if your world is Josh, then I want you to be brave and go after it.” “Because you’re my mama.” She nods. “Someday you’ll understand.”
“But if you changed your mind about something like that,” Emily says, “I think that’s the one thing that could dim her light. We both know Hazel is a butterfly. I think you have the power to take the dust from her wings.”
“I saw it and I thought it would make you laugh.” Josh’s eyes soften, and he gives me such an adoring smile, it’s nearly painful. “You look ridiculous in that. I hope you wear it all day.” “So, back up. Josh gave you a hat and that’s when you decided you’re in love with him?”
I miss Hazel. I’d buy a lifetime supply of fire extinguishers and eat bad pancakes every day to have her around again.
