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“I want every smile. Every giggle. All the tears. I want to fight with you just to make up with you.”
“But at the end of the good days and the bad days, let’s promise to meet back here, under the covers, in the dark, to lick each other’s battle wounds. Deal?”
The truth hurts more than a thousand lies. Lies can be forgiven, but the truth holds no debts.
On the surface, she doesn’t fit into my world. But in a way that lungs need oxygen and a heart needs blood, she’s vital to my life.
“I don’t need you to love me back … in this lifetime.” He smiles. My eyes fill with tears. How can one sentence be so beautiful and so forlorn at the same time? I don’t need you to love me back … in this lifetime. Nate Hunt deserves to be loved back in every lifetime—especially this one.
But I just want you. Since the day we met, it’s been that simple for me. And I’ll take you with the souls of a million lives woven into yours. I’ll listen when you need me to listen, I’ll protect you when you’re scared, I’ll be whatever or whomever you need me to be … but I won’t be him.”
Griffin doesn’t send me a dozen roses on my birthday. He hands me a single petal every day. Sometimes it’s a look. Sometimes it’s a whisper. And sometimes it’s opening my door, helping me out, and holding my hand all the way to the top of the steps.
No one will ever love him more than I love him, but maybe they’ll love him better.
he finally looks at me. And it’s clear that the only words left are the ones that change nothing, but mean everything. I love you.
“Swayze, you’re everything. The stars and the earth. The sun of a million lifetimes. You’re the girl I fell in love with. You’re the woman I want to love. You’re Morgan’s every smile. You’re my peace of mind. My salvation. You’re beautiful beyond words. Smart. Sexy. Just … everything. Except … mine.” She
“I woke up early that morning before the sun. And I watched you sleep. All I wanted was to scoop you up in my arms and take you with me. I wanted to chase darkness where we could hide beneath the shadows of a million sunsets. If you could transcend time, why couldn’t we stop it? Why couldn’t our love be immortal?”
I grab her face and lean down until my nose brushes hers, until we share the same breath. “We will bear each other’s burdens forever.
“Wanna crawl under the sheets with me and hide out for the night?” I shrug. “Not because we have to … just because we want to?”
My head bows in shame. Such a painful irony. I’ve been loved by two men, neither feeling they were the worthy one, when the truth is I’m the one not worthy of this kind of love from them.
“I haven’t had sex since December. I hope I remember how this works.” His words slay me. Almost as much as that grin. I didn’t ask. It wasn’t my business. But when a man loves a woman like Griffin loves me, he leaves no room for doubt or insecurity.
It’s been a year to the day since I got my second chance. I didn’t fuck it up. It was on a trip back home to visit our family in Madison. My parents planned dinner on the deck, yard games, and soaking up the end of summer before Swayze started her first official year as a full-time third grade teacher.
I stopped breathing
Griffin and I face each other, holding hands. Before the minister starts speaking, Griff leans forward and whispers in my ear, “I can’t wait to hear about your day, Swayz.”
And then the music starts: “Boxes” by the Goo Goo Dolls.
