The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less

by Barry Schwartz

When spouses are asked (separately) a series of questions about what’s good and bad about their marriage, each spouse holds him or herself more responsible than his or her partner, for both the good and the bad. People’s natural egocentrism makes it much easier to bring their own actions to mind than those of their partner. Because our own actions are more available to us from memory, we assume they are more frequent.

Postdecision regret is sometimes referred to as “buyer’s remorse.” After a purchasing decision, we start to have second thoughts, convincing ourselves that rejected alternatives were actually better than the one we chose, or imagining that there are better alternatives out there that we haven’t yet explored. The bitter taste of regret detracts from the satisfaction we get, whether or not the regret is justified. Anticipated regret is in many ways worse, because it will produce not just dissatisfaction but paralysis.

But individuals who regularly experience and express gratitude are physically healthier, more optimistic about the future, and feel better about their lives than those who do not. Individuals who experience gratitude are more alert, enthusiastic, and energetic than those who do not, and they are more likely to achieve personal goals.