Leviathan Wakes (The Expanse, #1)

by James S.A. Corey

“Say what you will about organized crime, at least it’s organized.”

back when they were young and, if not hopeful, at least more joyful in their fatalism.

youth brought invulnerability, immortality, the unshakable conviction that for you, things would be different.

“They say drinking helps, but it doesn’t,” Miller said. “No?” “Nope. Sex sometimes, if you’ve got a girl who’ll talk to you after. Or target practice. Working out, sometimes. Liquor doesn’t make you feel better. Just makes you not so worried about feeling bad.”

Then when he was older, wiser, more worn, and in the crushing pain of the divorce. He understood the longing for a greater being, a huge and compassionate intelligence that could see everything from a perspective that dissolved the pettiness and evil and made everything all right. He still felt that longing. He just couldn’t convince himself it was true.