Ghosted

by J.M. Darhower

“You don’t gotta be Breezeo! You can just be Daddy, and it’ll be okay! It’s gonna be Aunt Meghan’s birthday, and you can walk me to school, and we have to do the lines together so I can practice, ‘cuz I’m gonna be a snowflake! And how can I be a snowflake if you don’t stay?”

“I love you, Daddy. More than all the Breezeo movies ever.” “I love you, too,” he says, hugging her back. “More than everything in the world.”

“She’s smart. Creative. Funny. Beautiful. She’s a lot like her mother, actually.” “Her mother, huh?” Jazz grins. “Hate to break it to you, but it sounds like you might be smitten.” “No might about it,” I say. “I love her.”

“I didn’t want Mommy to be sad, ‘cuz you’re gone, so she got to have my Breezeo for now. He’s in her bed, taking a nap!”

“That’s… wow. You have to do it! Or you at least have to try. You’d be brilliant as Breezeo.” “Now you’re pushing it. If I go for the movie, there’s no way I’d ever get the lead. I can't carry a franchise.” “What? Of course you can! You’d be perfect, Jonathan. I’m serious! I mean, come on, nobody knows Breezeo like I do, and I’m a billion percent sure that it has to be you. So you have to try, okay? For me? Please?” “You just want to see me wearing the costume, don’t you?” “Well, I mean, I don’t not want to…”

I’ve been all over the world, but the only place I really want to be is Bennett Landing.” “You hate Bennett Landing.” “It’s where you are. Where Madison is.”

By choosing him, I changed my entire world, and looking at my mud-covered little girl, I know I’ll never regret a single moment.

Ten years ago, you ran away with me so I could follow my dream. It’s time you follow yours. Wherever it takes you, I’ll be there. Happy Dreamiversary. Jonathan

“Haven’t talked about it. Not sure it matters. Love doesn’t know titles.” He blinks at me. “Did you just quote Breezeo?” I shrug.

Madison hung up before I could tell you I love you, so this is me, telling you I love you.

Well, in that case, I love you, too. I stare at my phone. I read that message over and over. My fucking heart is battering my ribcage as I text her back. Do you really mean that? Her response comes right away. The emoji of the yellow lady shrugging.

(I mean it) (I love you)

Your eyes are lighting up, and I know—god, I know—you’ll make a great father, one of the greatest, and you’ll love this little girl with every part of your soul. But that can't happen until you’re ready.

But then she’s here, and she’s screaming, and I’m crying, and the second they hand her to me, the world tilts again. And that’s it. I know for an absolute fact that I will love this beautiful little being for the rest of my life. Until my dying breath, I’ll fight to keep her happy, to protect her heart from breaking, because she’s the greatest creation that’s ever existed, and we made her.

Her name is Madison Jacqueline Garfield, and someday, you’re going to know her. Someday, she’s going to call you her daddy. And when that happens, she’s going to steal your heart, and you’ll get that chance you asked for.

“I gots a line here but I dunno,” she says. “So I’m improvising like my daddy says.”

“I’m sorry I missed the beginning.” “It’s okay.” She shrugs. “You didn’t need to see them other people, anyway.”

“Hey!” Maddie says, narrowing her eyes at him. “Don’t say that! Breezeo’s not stupid!” “You tell him,” Jonathan says, nudging her.

“You don’t deserve none,” she tells him. “Only if you like Breezeo can you have some.” “Ah, that’s foul,” he says. “Does it count that I love the comic books?” She considers that before handing him a single, broken chip.

“I think he’s going to ask your Aunt Meghan out.” Her eyes widen. “Like on a date?” “Yep,” I say. “Oh, tell her she’s pretty!” Maddie yells, jumping around. “And bring flowers! Right, Daddy?”

“What’s wrong with forever?” “Nothing,” I say, “as long as you mean it.” “Would you believe me if I promised it?” “Yes,” I whisper. “That’s why I need you not to.”

“Dreams change,” he says. “The way I was living... I was miserable. I want my life back, and I’m taking it back, because I’ve wasted too much time. I’ll never give up on acting. It’s who I am. But it’s not all I am. I’m a father, and I want to be the man you thought I’d be. I’d be so much happier doing community theater, if it came to that, as long as I got to come home to you, than I ever was being Johnny Cunning without you. So if you want forever, goddamn it, I’ll be there.”

I remember promising once that I’d do whatever I could for you to someday see me in this costume.” My face grows warm. “You remember that?” “Of course,” he says. “It’s the whole reason I auditioned.”

“He did, but I said fuck it. He told me I had no shot in hell, but you believed in me, so I went for it, and look at me now.”

I laugh, snuggling against him, pressing a light kiss to his chest. “I love you, Jonathan.” “I love you, too.” He wraps his arms around me before whispering, “You’re the queen, baby.”

“Without a doubt,” he said. “I’m the luckiest man in the world tonight.”

I’m pregnant.”