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The words I’m asexual knocked around inside Alice’s head. She knew she was, had known it for some time.
Alice (a steadfast believer in the power of hugs) loved affection but knew it wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea.
What made sex so integral that people couldn’t separate the emotional love they felt from one physical act?
Love shouldn’t hinge solely on exposing your physical body to another person. Love was intangible. Universal. It was whatever someone wanted it to be and should be respected as such.
It was the intimacy of shared secrets. The comfort of unconditional acceptance. It was a confidence in knowing no matter what happened that person would always be there for you.
The bottom line was her body had never shown so much as a flicker of sexual interest in anyone. But that didn’t mean she liked being alone. That didn’t mean she wasn’t lonely. That didn’t mean she didn’t want romance and didn’t want to fall in love. It didn’t mean she couldn’t love someone just as fiercely as they loved her.
Intentions don’t change impact.”
Alice had always wondered what physical attraction would feel like, and while she didn’t necessarily dislike it, she wished there were a button she could press to turn it back off.
Sex, Alice had decided, was like jogging. All the people in the world could say it’s so amazing and great for you, but if you don’t care about jogging, you’d rather spend your time with a Netflix queue and a box of doughnuts.
Orgasms, Alice had decided, were like stretching after exercising. It felt amazing in the moment, but who really thought about that perfect stretch two hours later? She certainly didn’
“Asexuality isn’t something that’s black or white. There is a multitude of shades of gray in between. Being potentially sexually attracted to one particular person isn’t as outlandish as you’ve convinced yourself it is.”
I want what books and TV and the world has promised me. It’s not fair that I should have to want sex to have it.”
It would always be a huge deal, she would always be subjected to questions, and she would always have to defend herself. Would it ever stop feeling like A Thing, a barrier, between her and everyone else?
