I Was Anastasia

by Ariel Lawhon

As women we are taught that bravery and valor exist in the grand gestures. We believe that kindness is weakness and arrogance is the same as courage. But it is not so. Sometimes restraint proves the mettle of a man’s heart more accurately.

These are words (albeit paraphrased) that my mother spoke to me, at fifteen years old, shortly after being dumped by my first boyfriend. I lay on my bed, face down, in tears, as she rubbed my back. I was young and stupid, and the boy was an absolute douche-canoe. But her words remain true. She went on to tell me that time wound heal my heart (it did) and that I would wake up one day and realize that I hadn’t thought of him in years (I did) but, that when it came time to marry, I should find the kindest man I could. Like I said, my mother is the smartest woman that I know. I took her advice to heart and, many years later, I found that man. Reader, I married him.