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Kindle Notes & Highlights
Yeah, and I don’t bleed from my crease every month.
Um?
The only thing Craig ever gave me that meant anything was bacterial vaginosis, but I kept that to myself.
Surprisingly, the corks were still in the bottles so there was no danger of us being Rohipped and dragged to the nearest Premier Inn for a semi-conscious rape-fest.
Oh
It had a bend in it. I wasn’t sure whether he was pleased to see me or giving me directions to the bus station.
Well, upwards and towards the bus station.
Hi ho, hi ho, it’s back to my shitty job I go. Actually, there is a dwarf where I work
The office was bustling when I walked in, sweating like a priest at a pre-school pool party.
Daniel Wells – aka Dan Dan, the Dickless Man.
rubbing buttockly past desks
‘marshmellow’
How else?
I read online that calories don’t count past midnight. Or is that just with Gremlins?
didn’t stand a kitten in a pizza oven’s chance of winning.
generally find it hard to climax when I’m on a mattress that was around during the Renaissance.
Linus once called me Rheetard and I nearly yanked his head back and spat in his mouth.
1. The entire human race. Even the ones not born yet who are just poised in the birth canal, ready to come out and piss me off
She can suck my mammaries till Michaelmas
gigantic bag of crabs that she is.
I’m just going to leave that one hanging, like Gary should be.
Nigel Yardley looks like a large ball of Play-Doh with a smaller ball of Play-Doh stuck on top.
They think you’re weak and girly? Act weak and girly. Use their own prejudices against them. Then when they’re not looking, cut their fucking throats.
Nothing real was any good. And nothing living was worth living for. Everyone just needed to die.
How many men does it take to tile a bathroom? One – but only if you slice him veeeeery thinly.
‘You one of them feminists then, are you? Hate men and make them do their own washing?’
Nine pounds something and no drugs. Her vagina must look like a lasagne dropped from a department store roof.
People over ten who do cosplay – did you bump your head when you fell into your nursery school dressing-up box or something?
Risky, see? Me likes the risky cos Me’s a risky pixie.
When Happy comes along, I’ve got to hold on to it with both hands.
