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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Rick Cormier
Read between
February 20 - April 20, 2020
Our “world” is whatever size we perceive it to be.
It will soon become apparent to the reader that I tend to be blunt, opinionated, and playful.
He encouraged us to relax and be ourselves during the therapeutic hour.
He also encouraged us to interact with clients as we would our peers.
worked at keeping my psychotherapy sessions as light and upbeat as possible.
don't think that your success with anxiety clients is due only to all those techniques you use. I think it's you. I picture
Part of my success with anxiety clients was that I was so relaxed and casual I drove them nuts!
To avoid losing my own sense of self and risking burnout, I've learned to step back emotionally, once the work is done.
would a client in the office, with plain language, an open heart, and with lightness and humor.
Grad school was a surprise. I had no idea I'd be given a week to read four books at a time. No one warned me that I would be required to write 10- to 25-page papers plus a two-page paper for each class while simultaneously working on my master's thesis. For nearly two years. I saw my wife and son mostly on weekends.
had decided in grad school that the best way to be good at psychotherapy was to have lots of techniques up my sleeve to increase my chances of reaching the most people and treating the most disorders.
The more colors of paint on our palettes, the more people and illnesses we can treat.
What the unconscious mind doesn't know, it makes up!
This guy loves women so much he became his father's opposite because he didn't like the cold, detached way his father treated his mother.
“Well, the alcoholics drink more than 90% of the liquor produced in this country.”
“If only 22% of the public are alcoholics, how can they be drinking more than 90% of the liquor?”
All of the best things and experiences in my life have been the result of doing what I was afraid to do.
I'm often asked, “Why do I get panic attacks?” Panic attacks are your body's way of showing you who is really in control.
That's how controllers think: “If only the rest of you would do what you should, I could be happy!”
The positive side to controllers is that they excel in the workplace. Controllers are very responsible and take their jobs seriously. They tend to be organized, responsible, and detail-oriented.
It's important to understand that controllers are often perfectionists, holding themselves to impossible standards in an unconscious effort to please an imaginary parent in their head.
The more they eased up on themselves, the more they eased up on the people around them.
Children who grow up with a parent with anxiety issues are prone to them because they were raised with the clear – if unspoken –message that the world is unsafe.
Leaving the stressful situation temporarily teaches clients that they are not, in fact, trapped.
To treat his agoraphobia, I told him to go to the local mall and walk around until he couldn't stand it anymore, then go outside, sit on a bench, relax, then go back inside when ready. Repeat as necessary.
Now, you're going to close your eyes and play that little “movie” quickly in your mind, but you're going to add a musical score. I want you to think of the silliest and most ridiculous piece of music you can.
I remind him that he is in the back of the theater watching this film and then instruct the client to close his eyes and begin when he's ready.
1)Make the film black & white 2)Make the film blurry 3)Reduce the size of the picture on the screen 4)Make the film an animated drawing
As I used to tell my supervisors, “If I was perfect, you couldn't afford me!”
a study among people who survived drastic falls in suicide attempts, 70% admitted they regretted jumping while on their way down. I call this the “Oh Shit! Response.”
(Even the most outlandish ideas sound perfectly reasonable to someone in their manic phase.)
What many bipolar clients have admitted to me is that when their mood becomes stable, they miss the feeling of extreme well-being that comes in the early half of the manic phase.
Once I was working for community mental health agencies, I established a few boundaries. I would be willing to take on one borderline personality disordered client at a time and one schizophrenic client at a time. Both require very hard work.
Borderline clients are extremely manipulative and often use suicidal gestures and threats to manipulate others.
This is the same logic behind DBT: When you feel this, do that.
Something you said planted a seed. That seed took root and grew.”
saw the counseling as “planting seeds,” knowing that my efforts might or might not take root and grow someday.
Most addicts I've met use their addiction to keep their sadness, anxiety, or anger at bay. When you stop feeding your addiction, those emotions come blasting through the floodgate.
You need to figure out what activities, people, and thoughts make you happy and deliberately include them in your life.