Allegedly

by Tiffany D. Jackson

Ms. Stein limps into the kitchen, her bowlegs fat and swollen. You’d think someone would change their diet after they reach over two hundred pounds. But not Ms. Stein. She still eats an entire box of Entenmann’s crumb topped donuts a day.

LMFAOOOOO

Tara, one of my roommates, drops more breakfast dishes in the sink. She’s big, and black as tar, so I call her “Tar-ra.” But only in my head, because I don’t talk to anyone.

GIRL

She wears black wrist guards and one of those weight belts that sits right below her bulging gut, yet I’ve never seen her work out or lift anything but food to her mouth.

LMFAOOOOOOOO Tiffany is a comedian

Maybe I’m still asleep and this is all a dream. Maybe Momma hasn’t been taking her pills and is seeing things again. Or maybe she got the Alzheimer’s and belongs on the fifth floor. That has to be it. That’s the only explanation for her complete blindness. I stopped being a child six years ago. “Momma. I’m PREGNANT.”

The same bleach I poured into Ms. Stein’s coffee this morning. I want to remember it all so I’ll never miss it, wherever I go next.

LMFAOOOOOO